My stepson is stage 4 bowel cancer. He was diagnosed 18 months ago. I am feeling he has 2 months at best now. He is insisting on a liquid biopsy. His Oncology has explained that he won't benefit from one and from what I read it is only really useful in early detection and treatment . He spends a lot of time on a Colon Cancer Facebook group from all over the world and insists his team are letting him die because they won't let him have it. He is also wanting a PET scan, insisting it will show he isn't as sick as he looks (I appreciate this is denial) Has anyone had any experience with either of these procedures please?
Understand what you mean about talking into the void. I have found that often people just don't know what to say.
I think it important to acknowledge the emotions that we have, it then helps us to work through them.
Yikes, having to deal with denial is a tough one, whilst facing the reality of things is also hard it too enables us to realistically assess what is achievable in the present in relation to quality of life.
Will respond over here in your discussion page.
Yes communication is all important. When asked about progosis my husbands chemo doctor said there was no way of knowing who will respond to treatment and will only give us statistics.
I think having some sort of idea of prognosis perhaps gives us a feeling that we might be able to perhaps prepare ourselves, give us a small sense of control or perhaps in a practical way giving us opportunity to see what can be achieved in relation to quality of life for whatever time we may have with our loved ones.
Thank you Darcy. Your presence is very reassuring. Usually it is me being the one checking on others. I am a counselor so my go to is to look out for others and particularly now our family. It's been a long road even prior to diagnosis with our 'cancer kid'. I have to say I feel very alone at the moment. Being the stepmum, my husband's siblings, their wives and his friends don't correlate the impact on me. I asked him if anyone asks him how I'm going and he was gob smacked when he realized they haven't. My friends ask after him all the time. It could be a male thing...I love men by the way so not man blaming. This experience has given me much insight into the needs of those on this side of the fence. As a volunteer with a Palliative care Hospital I can see how far removed 'we' have become from really addressing the needs of families and cancer experiencers. Just because someone doesn't ask for help does not mean they don't desperately need it. It is so sad that it has come down to incidents and insurance 😞
Anyway we are now entering the pointy end with possibly 6 weeks at best to go. So no amount of biopsies are going to help 😕
Thank you again for being that gentle set of eyes looking out for me...and others here x
Sending ever so gentle thoughts your way. While self care is certainly necessary, it is no substitute for a real life person who has a decent coffee and a large block of chocolate on hand (as well as a box of tissues).
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