so even with time, nothing changes but the date on the calendar.....so alone in all this, struggling to engage in daily life, find myself staring into the abyss of this 'new' normal - nothing is what is was nor is what it should be and this 'now' is not even a very pleasant space or place to be. all is bleak and dark.... i cry
I feel your greif, I am feeling the same way. Can't get past how lonely i am feeling even when there are people around me. My husband passed a couple of weeks ago from myelodesplastic syndrome 3 months after diagnosis. He was only 45 ,we spent 24 years together and spent almost everyday together, as we had no children we had a connection that most of our friend and family dont understand. I cared for him at home in the final stages as he didnt want to go to hospital. I am finding it hard to get the memories of the last week out of my mind. It was the most challenging and heartbreaking thing I have ever done. Can't see a way past the sadness as another day goes by.
thanks your thoughts. It is still very hard to get use to the fact that he is no longer here. The loneliness I feel is hard to describe. Losing that connection you have with a person you love so deeply is probably the hardest part for me to cope with.
Just when I think I am doing ok I wake up and am a complete mess. It’s seems to be getting harder the more time that passes. I just miss the connection we had, that totally understanding that we had of each other without having to even talk about things, the intimacy, just having someone to share things with or to give advise when needed.
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