Hi champton,
I am very sorry for your loss. This year is my 35th anniversary as well, & I can imagine how much you are hurting. I, fortunately, still have my wonderful man.
Do you have children/other family members around you? If you do, are you talking with them about how you are all feeling? My sister died from breast cancer in 2004 & I am very close with one of her sons. He has told me that the worst thing about her passing was the fact the family didn't talk about it, or her. That had devastating consequences for him as he turned to alcohol for comfort. He has since sorted out his life & things are much better.
Talking things thru is one of the best ways to cope, & there are plenty of options for who you can talk to, eg; the help line here on Cancer Council, Lifeline, Community Health Social Workers, Priest/Pastor, or just friends/family. But there would surely be other ways as well. Take as much time as you need to grieve, but try not to dwell on the fact he is gone. Try just remembering the good times. Did your husband have any hobbies you could take up yourself? That might be another way to help ease your grief.
It's great that you've taken the step to talk here, & I hope we can help you overcome this very hard time in your life.
I'm wishing you the best
Budgie