It’s so good to hear you’re up and able to attempt the combo Sunday challenge, even if it’s still a painful mess, I’m pretty sure I’m speaking for everyone on the thread- we’ve been worried about you, and the reaction to ‘sucks balls’ Chemo, so any update no matter how small is a win. Even knowing you’re moving onto cycle 4.
How are you holding up?
Me, I cannot shake this virus/illness. The cough and my lungs/guts are just driving me a bit batshit crazy.
I’m not getting much rest due to coughing, my back, chest and now even my surgery scars are hurting, but at least I’m home so I can lie down if I need. Seems all the aches and pains are both attributable to my surgery and maddening menopause, but also sudden onset bursitis in my major joints. I’m kinda happy that I’m not going crazy and there is something i can do to treat it. It’s nothing on all the stuff you’ve been going through though.
Anyway, in other news- my husband just purchased a weeping cherry tree to plant outside our bedroom window. The guy has got serious moves! Oh and another olive tree, which is even sweeter because he despises olives. Reckon I’ll have to keep him around a bit longer.
happy Tuesday- keep us posted!
Loaded to the eye balls with Oxaliplatin. Shaking like a leaf on a windy day. Should make for some interesting typos and auto-corrects. Watch this space!
Not so winter-ish for the trip home today. So not suffering cold shock. I am feeling the tingling in my fingers and soles of my feet without them being cold.
Apart from that, symptoms seem to be similar to previous cy cel. A funny thing... trying to put my bag in the back of the car, holding a bottle of water in the other hand, which was shaking like a bastards. The lid was on, but not properly, so water was splashing all over me and the bag. Then my hands were wet and started to sting.
Home now. Settling in for a quiet night and see how this impacts me further. 🙄
It bums me you are still sick. It's making me Batshit crazy. You must have caught the dreaded man flu. I speak from experience. It's hard to shake. A good remedy I found is a marathon... of big bang theory on Netflix.
The funny side of this, you think my plight is worse than yours. Naaaaahhhh! I'm just a sook about it. You just need to get better. That's an order young lady! And who said you weren't crazy? Did your mother have you tested?
I'm jealous about the weeping cherry, but I got myself a new olive tree a few weeks ago. I have 5 out of 7 olive trees flowering at the moment. I only harvested off 3 trees last season. Fortunately, they all got a really good start in the green house (except the new one). Funny thing, I don't eat olives either. I pickled the last ones for my daughter.
Look after yourself. Rest, exercise and eat well. I have to dig up my pre/post beard pics. I'll try to find some that don't look like death warmed up.
In the meantime, I learnt to play this Jack White song on Monday. The rose with the broken neck.
Happy middle of October 😁😁😁😁😁
Hope you're all feeling a little better today. Horrible rain and cold today (Thursday). I have an olive tree too in the garden but no olives as yet. Just bought a small star anise tree and for some reason, that makes me incredibly happy.
I have been a misery guts lately. On Monday my husband said to me - You got dressed today? Well done. Ha ha! I hadn't realised how miserable I've been until then. My mouth feels like - I don't know what. Something horrible, alien, hot, uncomfortable. Surgeon said last Friday that he was surprised I was still feeling the after effects of Radiotherapy. I spiralled down then because I thought - if this is how it will always be - I don't want it. Luckily, on Monday I looked up after effects and they can last for 6-8 weeks so less miserable now. I have had to make a pact with myself to drink 2 of the chocolate nutritional drinks every day as that's about all I'm having. I just can't eat and have no interest in food at all. Hard to have any energy right now.
Today I'm going to start cooking for the first time in forever as I have a friend coming to stay from QLD and my sister is coming also from QLD in November. I need to lift myself up by my bootstraps and get on with things. I'm finding it hard to say no to people to have their children, pick up, drop off, feed and entertain. I have to keep saying no as my children all think that I'm over it all and back happy and healthy. That's a little bit far from the truth but I am doing one big drive and pick up of a kindergarten aged child once a week and am finding just that, really daunting.
Sorry. All sounds a bit bleak and I should be really grateful just to have survived. I want to do more than survive though. I want to bounce back and feel like myself again and that's just not happening right now. Hope you all have a great day and I know I'm going to work hard today to start feeling more "normal" again.
P.S. I have knitted 5 scarves, in the middle of 1 and 1 more to go. I don't need any scarves but wanted to use up left over wool. All my anxiety are knitted into the scarves and I'll give them to new homes next year. It soothes me to have my hands busy.
Sorry to hear you've been feeling crappy lately. This weather certainly doesn't help. It's as windy as anything on the west side of the bay, & now it's just started raining again.
Don't wear yourself out with all the cooking & running around you'll be doing. Remember to take it easy, & that things will get better. 😊
Oh Hey Lampwork,
Sending you some hugs over the interwebs. Had a bit of a cry when I read your post, you're one tough lady, it's okay to not be okay for a bit. Can tell your kids that you're not 100% and ask for a break in duties? It does sound like you need that extra TLC /mental break for a bit.
I've noticed that friends/family/colleagues just assume everything is normal unless you say, um Nope...
It's like a horrible sneaky little trick, our ability to be all resilient, and positive, and navigate such intense stuff- that sometimes (and I speak for myself) those around us see a return to before. But there is no before, there's just now and the real stuff happening second to second.
I have a theory...
I'm thinking that maybe the low energy is our protection. We superhumans need to return to the cave and recharge batteries to conquer the world again right? It's like the body and its subtle way of saying- hey, stop. You need this. Then it's a bounce back. Maybe not in the same way as before, more fierce even....that's my hope anyway.
Did I just go too Waa waa on you?
BTW-Really love that you're actively using your anxiety to create beautiful gifts for others who have less. It's just such an incredible testament to the grace you're showing when feeling so crap. Any of the above theories you can tell me to blow out my ass. Sending you more hugs today! xx
Thank you guys.
Yes. Best thread ever! You're exactly right Claire and I will try to think of low energy that way. My body protecting me. I have learned to stop saying Good whenever anyone asks me how I am. I've learned that I have to be a bit more forthright in future. I did think at one point in the day that my mouth felt better but then remembered I'd eaten two ice creams to ease the burning. Perhaps not quit better yet but am more positive that it will get better.
I drove to the kindergarten in pouring rain and howling wind. Rugged up but cold. The child was not at kindergarten and I felt embarrassed to not know that. I messaged her mother and her father called me. Their cry for help last week was a one of and did not mean that they wanted me to go back to picking her up full time again. I was quite relieved and happy to not have that put back on me right now.
Claire you did not go Wa-Waa! Definitely. I have been quite firm about not having a child for a week while her parents go on holidays to QLD. I have agreed to have their dogs but a child is just too much right now. I'm trying to convince her parents to just take her with them. It's still a little in the air but I will just have to hold firm. Having a visitor to stay next week absolutely frightens me. I am completely boring. Have been nowhere and seen no one. Have been hibernating full time. I really don't know what to do with a person. This is even scarier than a school child!
The knitting has been therapeutic so the people who need a scarf will be doing me a favour. I did cook a massive batch of spaghetti bolognese. Had a little for lunch and it was scrumptious but a bit of it stuck on the way down and that was the end of it. Perhaps a little too adventurous still. Anyway, have frozen 4 meals of it as I have no idea what to cook for my visitor next week. It was exhausting and luckily my husband did the dishes when he arrived home. I might just make soup tomorrow because I have to start eating again.
I am hopeful things improve soon. My neck has totally and finally healed so that is really good. Small steps every day, I hope. Thank you. Your responses made me teary, smile and laugh. Always good.
My wife and I started looking for properties and she mentioned how beautiful olive groves were. I tended to agree, but neither of this ate them. Anyhoo, it sparked some research and prompted me to by a few different varieties to compare. I keep them in pots and they are looking quite healthy.
I'm not letting cancer kill my dreams. The perfect product for us. Good investment, asphetic rewards and we don't eat the profits. On the other hand, a cherry orchard... poor investment as we'd eat all the profit and make cherry wine out of the stuff we couldn't eat. We'd be more pickled than the olives. And nothing makes you fart more than a 5kg box of cherries. 🍒
Out of the modest fruit I harvested from 3 olive trees, it all fits in a contain with about 250ml of brine. A modest first attempt. I used just salt in the brine so the olives would ferment as well. The 3 trees had fruit maturing at different times, but I just kept adding them to the same brine. Some have been in for 6 months and the most recent about 7 weeks.
They were all black when I put them in. Mostly green now now from the brine. I need to freshen up brine again but can't touch it while I'm on chemo.
My daughter is going off to uni next year, so it will be her gift when she leaves. She is our little freak. The only one in the family that eats olives. It's better she goes off to uni and not eat the profitable potential of my future olive grove.
Now I have 5 trees flowering and they are growing well. I'll pickle some more next year.
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