Complaints about the little things

[PhilPepper]

Hi folks

I am going through another phase where I'm posting on this site a lot. There a lot of big things going on and everyone has that. I'm feeling stressed by little things as well. It seems petty to complain about them, like they are first world problems. But here I go being petty.

This is not directly related to my cancer, but my surgery to remove it. An ileostomy and bowel resection. It feels like they pulled everything out and randomly shoved it all back in. If I lay on my side, it feels like everything inside sags. I usually sleep on my left side and now I have so much discomfort. Since returning from hospital, we swapped sides of the bed. So now if I want to cuddle my wife, I can't role onto my left side to do it. Frustrating, because she is dealing with this cancer too. She is on the journey with me. I want to be supportive for her but it's like I'm being cold instead.

So there you go. Me being petty. Frustrated because I can't lay on my left side.

Sorry. I just needed to shout about it.

[sch]

Hi Phil,

How long has it been since surgery?

I know what you mean about the feeling of everything having been shoved back in.  It just feels... uncomfortable.  It gets better with time. 

Now I can't feel anything.

-s

[Katekat]

Here's a photo of one of my dachshunds to cheer you up!

She was pretty unimpressed here after a big bath, definitely not a fan of water. She was the best dog though! 

[PhilPepper]

Hi Sch

I just hit the 4 week mark yesterday. I feel like I've been complaining too much. So many other people going through some really tough recovery periods. I can't discount how fortunate I've been. The surgeon says my recovery is ahead of normal expectations. As this is my first surgery, I think it caught me by surprise. Realistically, the cancer never caused me so much pain.

I'll bounce back. I'm just frustrated how I can have a small discomfort, but with such a big emotional impact.

Cheers

Phil

[PhilPepper]

Hi Kate

She is beautiful. She sounds like my Princess, Sally. Hate a bath.

Cheers 

Phil

[sch]

Hi Phil,

Sorry if I'm a little slow to respond. I really only get a chance to reply from time to time. Work and family take up most of my time.

It takes a while to feel normal again, or perhaps it takes a while to establish a new normal? You can choose.

Do you mind if I ask about your surgery? Was it just the tumour you had removed?

-sch

[PhilPepper]

Hi Sch

Yes they removed a tumor. About 20cm of bowel. It started as stage 2, then became stage 2.5 sort of. Now they just call it stage 3. But still early in the stage 3 zone. 24 lymph nodes removed. Only 1 was cancerous, but it pushed me up to the next level. Chemo starts tomorrow. 

Cheers

Phil

[sch]

Phil,

I'm sorry to hear this. 

It sucks. It sucks hard. But I know that you will beat this.

Chemo isn't the greatest. But it sure as hell beats cancer.

Let me know if you want more info or you want to discuss strategies on getting through it.

-s

[Katekat]

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@PhilPepper wrote:

Hi Sch

Yes they removed a tumor. About 20cm of bowel. It started as stage 2, then became stage 2.5 sort of. Now they just call it stage 3. But still early in the stage 3 zone. 24 lymph nodes removed. Only 1 was cancerous, but it pushed me up to the next level. Chemo starts tomorrow. 

Cheers

Phil

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All the best with your chemo today @PhilPepper 

[PhilPepper]

Hi Kate

Thank you. Chemo went well, but it's unpleasant. I'm making adjustments to get through it.

I think I'm angry about it being such an inconvenience to my life style. Perhaps I haven't fully grasped the situation and I haven't quite accepted that normal life should be put on hold. Maybe I just want it all to bugger off.

Cheers

Phil