Thanks. Good days and bad days. It’s a constant struggle. I try to be happy but it’s fake, nothing brings me joy anymore. It is what it is I guess, this is life now. Just a nobody trying to survive. Not caring about anything does feel liberating. But I do miss being happy. ... View more

This little thing called cancer, So, Friday, my doctors appointment to tell me good news or bad. Late December 24 I was diagnosed with bowel cancer. If you’ve been through it, you know the struggle. Fast forward to now, Monday morning, up early, breakfast, workout, cold shower. I am cancer free. I beat cancer. I am alive. Thank you to everyone for your support in my darkest hours. ... View more

Thanks Cindi. I’m exercising regular again, eating healthy,  meditating and having cold showers. I want to be stronger than I was before, thats my new goal. Life keeps ticking by, and I’ll try to make the best of it. Nothing will stop me… ... View more

Thank you for your support. It’s been a crazy year of just surviving. It would be so easy to give up, leave work and just hide at home. Even though I hate my job I somehow keep working. I guess I’m just stubborn. The cancer destroyed my confidence and my body. Slowly I’m getting it back. ‘ In order to grow, you must cut a piece of your self of, no matter how much it hurts’  Great quote that I now tell myself every time it gets hard.   ... View more

Test, test and more test. Life doesn’t stop if your healthy, happy or sad. My fingers toes and ears are crossed for your successful results. I will keep my feet turning over with you until the very end, we control our own happiness evan though the universe may be against us. Let me know how it all goes, all the best fellow traveler. ... View more

Update, so I went to my new GP, did some tests and found out my vitamin d levels are dangerously low, cholesterol is high and all else is good. Need to put on some weight to boost my energy levels as well. He suggested I have a mental assessment but I declined. I have good days and bad days, that’s life. Had the colonoscopy on fri and my surgeon said it all looked clear and he was happy with everything. Need to see him again 20 Feb for further results. It looks like I might have beaten this thing. Yet I can’t stop feeling anxious, I should be happy and celebrating. I worry over the dumbest things all the time now, side effect of everything I’ve been through, psychically and mentally. A year of hell has changed me, I’m not the same person I used to be, I just need to let go and move forward. Never give up, never surrender💪 ... View more

So brave and strong, I wish I had your strength. I still can’t accept what happened to me, but I will try after reading your words. Merry Christmas aumaum ... View more

Better today. A good nights rest clears the mind. Still so very tired though. Going to see my GP in Jan for some help, maybe some antidepressants will help. This journey sucks. I thought it would get easier. Taking it a day at a time is the best advice. Learning to not look to far ahead in the future is something I have to learn. At least I won’t have to spend this Christmas in hospital with all those tubes stuck in me. And no more chemo so I can enjoy a good meal with the family. Merry Christmas to you my friend, it’s always a pleasure having someone to talk to who knows the struggle. Congrats on almost 4 years, time keeps ticking no matter if we are sick or healthy, all the best to you and your family. ❤️💪👍👌✌️😜 ... View more

Bad days. Friday I came home from work early feeling burnt out. Spent the next 2 and 1/2 days in bed worrying. I thought I was over this hurdle. Those lingering worries are still banging in my head. Do I have the will power to keep going. Splitting headache, ringing in left ear, so tired, pain everywhere. No finish line. It’s so draining, makes everything you do extremely hard, and kinda pointless. Found out someone I knew just passed away from cancer, he was 60 years old. That triggered my down fall. Will this ever end… ... View more