Hi @jess18  Congratulations on the birth of your daughter! I am so sorry to hear about your cancer diagnosis and what a tough time to receive it. You must feel that you are meant to be enjoying this time with your new family and now cancer has come to interrupt this.   To catch cancer early is a great thing. There should be treatment options. Has a doctor discussed these with you?   Tips? Stay as physically active as you can. I know that this is especially difficult as you have a new born.   Stay positive!   Hopefully in 12 months time this will all just be a bad dream 🙂   Take care.     ... View more

Hi @Log_Cabin_Cat  Just thought I'd check and see how you are going. How are you feeling now?   -s   ... View more

Hi Lehiatus,   I'm so sorry to hear that you have more challenges to face yet again. You went through the challenges of a devastating disease and you managed to overcome the obstacles that it presented and you overcame those challenges with grace. But now, three years later, to be again facing more challenges.   But I believe that there is hope. Many people who are diagnosed with incurable cancer go on to live for many years. My father was diagnosed with incurable cancer and he went on to live for 10 years.  I think that if they can help you sort out the issue with your heart, hopefully they can get you home soon and you can be at home with your family for years.   Palliative care means that the person who said that believes there is little to no hope of a cure. It gives no indication of how long. Talk to your treatment team in a meeting and get their perspective. Remember to take someone else with you and/or record that meeting so you have something to refer back to.   There is always hope. You are a beautiful soul Lehiatus.   -Sean   ... View more

Hi @BadWolf73  I'm sorry to hear.  It sounds like you've had a hard time of it. Sometimes it just feels like it's just one thing after another and they just keep on going. As if we barely get time to catch our breath before the next issue hits. Or at least that is how it felt for me. I've had so many surgeries and operations and parts removed, I feel somewhat like a mutant some days.   If it is benign, why is it no longer operable? Because it's too close to important parts?   -Sean         ... View more

Hi LCC   I'm sorry to hear about your diagnosis and that you feel "fake sick". Like you say, it would be lovely to wake up and it's all just a bad dream. But this is real and it's shit. And, unfortunately, well, it is what it is. There have been times where it feels like it would be easier to just not participate and hasten the inevitable end. A stage 4 diagnosis is not necessarily the end. Don't give up hope yet.   I'm no expert, but you will likely have another meeting with an expert and or treatment team and she/he will discuss your treatment options with you. Some people with a stage 4 make a recovery, and other diagnosed can survive for many many years. But everyone is different and is depends on the cancer and the person.   Treatments for cancer have improved in leaps and bounds. Discuss your options with your doctor and your treatment team. Keep that hope and nurture it. You can achieve amazing things yet.   But if the worst comes to the worst or you decide you don't want to fight this, my advise is to discuss your diagnosis with your husband and children and be open to alternatives.   Please keep us posted with how you go. ... View more

Fair call. One could argue the medical centre which is making you better, is about making you well, not about cancer. Yes this is probably a bit of a stretch. I'm sorry. When we're unwell and many will be down in the dumps, we're trying to concentrate on what we are doing right, and not what is wrong. A psychological difference only, maybe.  But any difference and focusing on what matters and not what doesn't can only help. Best of luck to you. -s ... View more

Hi @Jennifer66  Everyone struggles with the questions to ask. Taking someone with you is generally advisable because everyone forgets everything when they walk into that appointment. I would advise creating a list beforehand and going into that meeting prepared. CancerCouncil now has a web page with some thoughts or ideas for questions to ask. https://www.cancercouncil.com.au/cancer-information/when-you-are-first-diagnosed/questions-to-ask-your-doctor/?utm_source=&utm_content=&utm_medium=cpc&gclid=CjwKCAjw9-6oBhBaEiwAHv1QvBNv4QXGtoA9ksOvJBnlAcszWBtOydtnH6NYFzXlahc4YrubdQaF_hoCn6wQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds Another good idea is to record the meeting with your doctor. It's not uncommon to forget some of the answers in these situations.   As for a stoma bag, my surgeon performed an ileostomy so a stoma is not necessary.   -s ... View more

Hi @Jennifer66    I had bowel cancer, not bladder cancer, but I hope this can be of some use to you. I elected to have both surgery and chemotherapy which were both options available to me. I had stage 2a bowel cancer so I was considered cured of cancer as soon as I had the cancer removed post-surgery. I then chose to have a total colectomy (reduced the risk of cancer coming back by something like 70%) and then I had chemotherapy (reduced the risk be something like 5% of the cancer reoccuring).   My advice would be to ask the doctors/surgeon which options will have the greatest effect, but also check with them what will be the long term side effects.   Best of luck -s ... View more

This is great news. All the best for the future. ... View more

Hi @Scott1  Isn't this the truth.   The 18 months is just a statistical number. It's based on patient numbers before you. Nothing more, nothing less. This is where you lose hope, but also where you find it again.   In 2019 when you received your prognosis, knowingly or unknowingly, you went through a process and prepared yourself to die. You said your goodbyes to your wife, family and loved ones. You tidied your affairs, you ticked off the bucket list. You lost all hope.   But what happens if the best case scenario happens and you live? What now? Because now that you're alive, you still need to find hope again. Doctors, surgeons, psychologists and therapists. They've very good at what they do, but they don't seem to be good at preparing you for life again (just the other way around).   Find one thing that you enjoy doing for yourself. Do it for no other reason than because you enjoy doing it. Maybe it's as simple as sitting in the sun or sitting on a seat and staring out over the ocean. Or going for a walk. Start with just that one thing and then build upon it.   Start at the start, because it makes for a good beginning. ... View more