Hi Kim Welcome to the site. It's good you're nearly at the end of treatment although that can be a confusing time as well. I remember I felt relieved but also suddenly adrift without the goal of getting thru treatment. Herceptin for a year is a breeze after chemo, and I actually liked still going into the hospital and seeing the nurses. I hope your treatment is going well and you are not feeling too bad. ... View more

I am working on the getting on with it too. It is hard sometimes. I think people would be surprised but how much it still affects me. Today I had my second annual check-up and all was fine. It was odd sitting in the waiting room at the clinic. That's where I waited before I got my diagnosis. I had no idea that was what was going to be the result and I was wondering if there was anyone waiting there this morning in that situation - all innocent and unsuspecting and about to be given a cancer diagnosis. I hope your breast reconstruction went well. I remember mine looked so weird at first when it was all wrapped up but I am happy with it now. ... View more

Hi Glenys, Just thought I should mention I am on anti-depressants which presumably help my mood. I have been on them since last December. I would like to try to get off them in the next few months but have to be careful not to stop suddenly. Also, I was recommended to a website by another user here which is about learning to think more positively. I found it very helpful. www.moodgym.anu.edu.au Best Wishes Allicat ... View more

Hi Glenys I don't know how you accept it. I think time passing helps. Maybe a new hobby or something else to focus on would help. I started pottery a few months ago and I really like it. It is very calming and satisfying. I also like being with a new group of people who don't know I had cancer. With people who have known me longer I tend to feel as if they constantly think of my cancer when they talk to me but I am gradually realising that they don't. To me it was a huge life-changing thing but to them I seem just the same as before. Sometimes this is irritating but I think it helps me to think of myself as a normal person instead of a cancer survivor. Best Wishes Allicat ... View more

Hi Maddie You have been having a tough time for a long time & a professional to help you is a great idea. Just having someone neutral to talk to is good and I have found that I cry a lot more at counselling than anywhere else. I think that is a good healthy thing to be able to go somewhere and let out all the pent-up emotion. Best Wishes ... View more

Every morning when I have my shower I look in the mirror and I have one normal breast and one that is shaped a bit differently and has a long horizontal scar across it instead of a nipple. It used to bother me but it doesn't any more just because I've seen it so often that I'm used to it. This is what my body looks like now. Sometimes when I see things that remind me of a pair of breasts with nipples or there is actual discussion of nipples of the tv or something it makes me feel a bit creepy about my scar and missing nipple. But it doesn't make me really upset, just a bit unsettled. I think it is getting less. While I was in hospital after the mastectomy I watched an all-day Frasier marathon. So now when I see Frasier it makes me think of that. But it doesn't matter as I don't have bad memories associated with the hospital, it's just memories. At some point things that were a big deal become less of a big deal. They become something that happened in the past, not something that you have to deal with on a day-to-day basis. That was something I said to myself during chemo - "one day, this is going to be in the past". Maybe how you accept things is when you can start to think of them as part of your life, instead of something outside your life that you wish would go away. One of the things that happened to us in our lives was that we had cancer. But, we were lucky and we got better and more things happened in our lives afterwards. Is the memory of the actual surgery that you hate? Or the result? The lob-sided feeling sounds really annoying. I remember my plastic surgeon saying it was very important to get the weight of the implant right so the two sides were even. Is someone able to help you get the falsie fitted so that it feels better for you? When you have the falsie on and have your clothes on does it feel ok and look ok? My implant looks odd when I have no clothes on but when I am dressed it looks fine. It is important to be able to feel confident that it looks normal. On holiday I wore my two-piece bathers on the beach and didn't even think anything of it. Afterwards when I did think about it I was pleased. I probably sound really calm about the whole thing now and I was relatively calm even at the time but I also spent many hours at counselling before the mastectomy crying and crying and crying. At counselling this morning I was slightly weepy when we talked about the day I was diagnosed but I spent a lot of time smiling and laughing. I don't know if you have been to counselling but I find it very helpful (mostly - sometimes she accidentally upsets me). When I have bad negative thoughts in my head talking or writing about them gets them out. ... View more

I'm back from my trip! Successfully got my injection although not without drama. The day before the appointment I tried to ring to confirm but I only got an answering service who told me they were closed on Wednesdays. So, the next day I went along at the appropriate time and the receptionist was not expecting me and had no knowledge of my appointment. I showed her the email arranging the appointment and she went to investigate. It seems that the person I talked to (who works in a different branch) had not actually told anybody at the relevant branch that I was coming. Anyway, I waited for about an hour and a half and then they took my pulse, blood pressure and temperature, got me to sign a waiver, and then gave me the injection. Everybody was very kind and nice to me and so in spite of the scheduling problem it was a good experience. It was interesting seeing in their chemo room and then in the little room where we went for the injection there was a weird extendible bed that had a dispenser for a disposal sheet for me to lie on. The doctor signed the form that she had given me the injection, so I have to take that along to give to my regular nurse when I have my next injection this Thursday. ... View more

Hi Glenys Is there some suggestion that you have a recurrence? I hope everything is ok. I had a great time in America with my sister. I thought it might be awkward as we hadn't seen each other for a while but we got along really well. ... View more