Hi Filafrog,   If you have free time, please take a look at some of these supporting and informative web links. Some provide insight to other's experiences which can help with comfort too. https://www.bowelcanceraustralia.org/finding-support - Support listings, healthy recipes, bowel cancer forums, bowel cancer stories and additional resources.   https://cancerqld.org.au/get-support/cancer-emotional-support/support-groups/ - Cancer Council Support   https://www.healthdirect.gov.au/living-with-bowel-cancer - Overview   https://www.bowelcanceruk.org.uk/how-we-can-help/support-for-you/ - Cancer is an universal experience. ... View more

Hi Ginny,   Going for an motorcycle ride sounds rather exciting. I'd be too scared myself, no sense of balance and all.    If you don't mind me asking, how is everything going?? ... View more

Hi DonCorleone,   Welcome to our friendly little neighborhood forums, let us know how everything goes with the treatment? Sounds like the specialist is lining up a few things. ... View more

Hi Rosie,   May I recommend the following?   Emotion Focused Coping Plan: Involves trying to reduce the negative emotional responses associated with stress, anxiety, depression and etc. This method is helpful to clear the mind so the individual can think more clearly.   Physical exercise e.g. Running can help clear the mind Having a warm relaxing bath and letting the muscles loosen up Find comfort within yourself e.g. Give yourself a pep talk in front of an mirror, this has been known to reinforce positive thought patterns. Emotional disclosure – Express yourself through writing or talking, keep an journal Meditation Reading an novel Listen to music -Play with a pet Listen to music Draw Problem Focused Coping Plan: This method is typically more distracting or proactive in manner. It’s usually used to change aspects about the situation you’re in; this can exact to how you receive support for example.   Finding the ideal support method for yourself e.g. Arranging to see an support group Establish healthy boundaries – what can you change in your life? Eat healthier, spend more time outside e.g. gardening or see family more. (Or cut off someone toxic from your life). Work on managing time Create a to-do-list – what needs to be cleaned up around the house or start a mini project. But you need to find what best works for you, maybe simply speaking and spending time with your mother/family can provide the comfort or distraction your after. Just being involved in the general process can provide comfort. (I use to admire paintings myself, more specifically the expressionism and impressionism fields. It was easy to lose yourself in the wispy reflected tones and playful lighting).   Please let us know, how it goes?? ... View more

Yessssss, that's awesome! ... View more

Waiting for the results is simply an irritating and hellish feeling.  I remember many times sitting in that waiting room with a loved one, for different reasons. One day it was to see scan results and another it would be a biopsy outcome. It’s a necessary and unwanted evil that never got any easier.   Why are they deciding to test yours now? Did something show up on a scan? ... View more

Hello Worriedwife,   5- fu is fluorouracil right? That's an chemotherapy drug, so he is not completely without treatment. It sounds like the doctor just wants to be careful as not to cause any potential damage.   Cancer is difficult to predict, so there's no real answer to that as some people can be on many treatments and it still might occur rarely. While others will be on none and nothing occurs.  ... View more

I'm sorry that you’re feeling so alone; perhaps it's time to seek out additional support. Maybe speaking with the hospital’s guidance counselor or attending a support group will help ease the feeling of isolation?? Have you spoken with other families or friends yet? Possibly you and your husband could attend appointments together?   https://cancerqld.org.au/get-support/cancer-emotional-support/cancer-counselling-service/ -Support Link https://www.lifeline.org.au/get-help/online-services/crisis-chat - If the pressure ever becomes a little much. ... View more

Hi Trysta, Welcome to this little supportive family over this side of the internet.   I cannot express myself enough when I state that:  All feelings are valid & All thoughts are valid. Let me reassure you as much as possible, that feeling guilty for whatever reason is absolutely common and completely standard.  It’s often one of the first reactions people may experience; many have felt this before and many have thought something similar as well.   E.g. It should have been me, why did this happen? Those thoughts are normal to any surreal situation; I’m familiar with them too, many are. (Feeling helpless or powerless tends to breed frustration and angry as a byproduct). You are not selfish and you shouldn’t feel guilty (even if it’s a standard reaction). You are clearly a supportive and deeply caring partner – you seeking support, advice and assistance even demonstrates this.   From my understanding, your husband seems to be isolating/shielding you in private from the direct situation but acknowledging you in public, in regards to “being a team/I couldn’t do it without you” so thus recognizing your supportive nature? That is understandably conflicting and confusing but I’m going to attempt to approach the topic at hand, so please forgive me in advance if my understanding is mistaken.   Given the actions of your husband, maybe he is trying to protect you by creating a fence/barrier by blocking out direct actions or acknowledgement in more personal environments (the home environment for example). He is lessening your direct involvement and doesn’t appear to like recognition or reminders of the topic.  He wants to indirectly protect you and by doing this, he is providing the support he feels you may need. E.g. Wanting to speak about it is recognizing the topic, keeping messages or information to himself is shielding you.   He protects you by pushing you away, yet publicly announces and highlights the fact that you’re devoted and committed which is something he doesn’t need to do. This demonstrates his love and since it’s public and not private, it feels less direct to the cancer topic.   I'm not sure if this helped any as it's just my view on it.  ... View more

Okay sorry for the quick reply, I redesigned the post now. If your concerned about others viewing, I can delete my post and remove once your ready. ... View more