12 months is like a lifetime

[peanutz]

Yesterday was one year since my partner was diagnosed with GBM. I was planning to have a little celebration with him. Unfortunately, he wanted to go to the G with his brother. I was so mad but let him go and have some fun. They love having good old boys time at the G in the members' area having good food and wine while watching footy or cricket. I can't believe this is someone whose oncologist nearly admitted him to the hospital last Monday as he was in a bad shape when he went to the hospital for his appointment. He spent the whole week in bed and struggled to go to the hospital for blood test. On Friday he was so weak and the nurse threaten not to give him chemo as he looked so weak. Well, he's tired but he just got out of the loo for serious business when the nurse came and got him. What do you expect? Anyway, the boys had too much of a good time. My partner came home drunk (first time ever I've seen him drunk) and missed a step on the front veranda, fell over and got a cut on his nose. I didn't see when it happened but luckily his brother and his brother's wife were with him. I was inside the house doing the vacuum, came out and saw him on the ground bleeding. We got paramedic to help getting him inside and check him but decided there was nothing to worry. He had another fall last night but picked himself up after a while. I couldn't help him as he's nearly 2.5 times heavier than me. He said he would never get so drunk and be bad like yesterday again :) Well, so much for a year anniversary for someone who was told he had 9-18 months to live initially and now potentially 2-3 months to go.

[SILLY]

Such a disappointment for you ! I suppose you have to forgive him considering what he's going through . I know that you are going through a lot as well but he just wasn't thinking about that when he made his plans . Perhaps you can still have your celebration together and with a better outcome .

[peanutz]

I guess it's not too much of a disappointment that my partner went to the footy instead of spending time with me. I'm happy to see him happy and in a way I got time off from looking after him. Celebration for special occasion is overrated anyway. We try to find thing to celebrate when we feel like it :) I'm mad at the fact that someone who enjoys life and can still look after himself and occassionally go out were told that he hasn't had many months left. I don't know how fast people who has GBM can drift off but 2-3 months seem a bit on a pessimistic side, I think. I'm also mad that his brother didn't look after him well enough not to get him too drunk which resulted in a couple of falls with cuts and bruises afterwards. They are all grown up boys but I guess boys will be boys.

[Deni_55]

Good on you for letting him go. Maybe acting the way he did made him feel alive . When my partner was diagnosed Nov 2011, life became very electric. We were determined to live in the "now" and enjoy what we could. I think we pretty well have done that. He is slowly deteriorating here and there. It depends on how much Dex he takes. With the chemo he needs 8mg for 2days then 4mg then down to 2mgs. He seems to be coping most of the time, but struggles with mobility. He finds short term memory can be vague. But I know what you mean. Sometimes I look at my partner and I think he won't see the rest of the day and then I think "what cancer" We were told a littel over 1year-2years and have just clocked 9months. The numbers we are given are just that-numbers and averages. But it was helpful having an initial timeframe. We don't know where Kevin is at the moment in regards to time as his parent tumor grew back (more surgery) and now there is a second one. Don't know if we want nor need to know. It's all a bit surreal. You're right, celebrations can be over rated. Enjoy the now Deni

[peanutz]

"With the chemo he needs 8mg for 2days then 4mg then down to 2mgs." I think you mean Dex and it's interesting how your partner takes it at different doses depends on the chemo schedule. What chemos is he on? My partner is always on the same dose and his dose depends on how he feel or what the scan is like.