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Numb

Jods77
July 2010
Dad passed away @ 3.15am today after fighing one bloody tough battle. Im numb,im sad, im relieved, im angry, im hurt, im frustrated, i feel sick, i want to curl up in a ball, I want to be there for my mum, I want to be alone...I don't know what I want! I know I have been preparing for this and even as late as 8pm last night was talking to mum about the process and that I had been talking to a celebrant in relation to the service dad has said he wants. Now its real. I will grieve and I know thats okay. Im glad I got to see him today, kiss him, hug him and help him when he needed it. I am sitting here quietly waiting for my husband to return who has gone to pick up my brother so we can go and be with mum. Now another journey begins on our rollercoaser of life. You will now be able to breathe freely Dad....I love you xox
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7 Comments
KatDoe
Occasional Contributor
July 2010
I'm sorry for your lost. Cancer is a horrible disease. My dad is battling it right now. But the cancer is winning. Thinking of you Kat
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WishingStar
Contributor
July 2010
Hi Jods, Sorry to hear about your dads passing. Thinking of you, Nicole
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samex
Regular Contributor
July 2010
Hi Jods, Your post reflects the all to real confusion you are feeling. Please accept hugs and thoughts as you face your own grief but also being there for your Mum. remeber to take care of yourself as well. Samex
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jodielee12
Contributor
July 2010
Hi Jods i am so sorry to hear of youor loss. i am thinging of you and your family. take care Linda
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chris_martin
Contributor
July 2010
Hi Jods I am so sorry to hear about your loss. Everytime I log onto this site someone else has passed away and I realize I am getting closer too. My dad has oesophageus cancer and even though I ring him every night I know the end is coming- he is having so much trouble breathing-and I don't know how to cope.When you said"now you can breath freely dad" I know what you mean. You are lucky that you have support which I don't.y brothers feel that he is old (83) and it is his time to go. But I can'seee it like that. I think I should call my brothers and remind them that they might have regrets when something happens. At least I will be at peace!!!! as IJJ know I have done all I can to help dad and he knows that as well.Jods please take care of yourself and your mum xoxo Chris
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Mrs_Elton
Contributor
July 2010
Jods, My heartfelt sympathy to you and your family on the loss of your precious Dad. Treasure your memories of happier times with him, I hope that they will bring you comfort. Kind regards, Jill
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Not applicable
August 2010
Hi jods, Sorry to hear your news... Hope you find some rainbows soon... Thinking of you Wifeyb
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