Blogs - Page 265

It is a grey day. Not the sort of grey day in autumn that makes the colour of the dropping leaves stand out, just a damp, misty, miserable, grey day. It makes me realise that for some of us it would be a grey day no matter what the weather. Friends who have to manage where they are, or where their partner is - feeling as if the mist and dampness is closing in around them.

How do I reply when people ask "how is your Dad?" Do they really want to know? For a long while now I have just said okay, or he's not too bad which is how he will also respond to people when they ask him; I have seen him keep up appearances for tohers for so long as he doesn't want to worry them.

Yesterday was a good day, today was better than Monday and Tuesday but not as good as yesterday. Greg had a restful sleep overnight, I slept solidly for about an hour and then really only dozed the rest of the night, listening out for Greg and physically checking on him regularly. He woke up about 8.45am but was quite groggy. He is definitely not as alert as he had been yesterday afternoon and evening. He is having trouble with his memory, getting the days mixed up and unsure of the time of day.

To all of you who are going through such a hard time, my heart goes out to you. I have no words that can ease your pain, and it is a road we all have to cope with somehow. Reading Mrs Elton's blog shows me what my family will have to go through with me when the time comes, and reading Jodds77 blog, I get an inkling of what awaits me. It does seem surreal right now as my tumours have shrunk and I feel pretty good, but I know that sooner or later it will come and yes it does scare me. I wish I could protect my family from all this heartache.

Today is my RDO from work, I have been able to go and get my hair done and do the bits and pieces that I needed to. This has also included taking some old 8mm film to be put on to DVD. There were 4 films in total with them all have some images of my Dad on them.