maddie86
hi all.. havent actually blogged for a long while now... as a few of you know my boyfriend had stage four bowl cancer and went through 4 major surgeries.. bowel, liver and 2 lung ops... he also had 6 months of chemo and radiation.. things were looking so well and bright.. we could finally be happy again... we had such a shit year and now the future seemed like it was going to be ok... he came to my work today and i knew by the look on his face something wasnt right.. he got the results from his CT check up scan and was told that the cancer had come back now in his lymp nodes, in the stomach and there was a spot in the liver... i feel so sick and distraught.. after all that hard work after all the painful days in IC recovering.. for what? he wasnt given a proper time frame, but im guessing its 12 months or so... im in shock.. we've gone from talking about moving out together and marriage to now just nothing... the future is bleak... i feel numb.. how could this be? how will i cope with what horrible things are to come? i dont even want to celebrate christmas now... i dont want new years eve to come because i know the new year is nothing to look foward to... feeling very blue today 😞
5 Comments
Mignon
Contributor
You poor darling, I wish I could give you a big hug. Words are pointless as you face a terrible reality. It is fair enough to feel blue today, look after yourself though, you have a long journey ahead. Regrads Mignon
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maddie86
Contributor
thank you mignon.. still feeling in shock.. not looking foward to the future wish time could stand still... 😞
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exhausted
Contributor
Dear Maddie I know it's tough but you will cope, somehow we all do. Your man is very lucky to have you walking this path with him. It's ok to feel crap for a while, sometimes life is totally crappy. Look after yourself too. Hugs Terese.
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maddie86
Contributor
thank you.. just seems like an endless battle... im so tired from it all.. i just want to sleep all day and not face reality, although i know i have to.. just trying to take it one step at a time..
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Sunshine006au
Contributor
Oh Maddie... I feel for you, its awful when we think things are ok, only to be knocked over by bad results..I know how hard it is & some days it would be great to shut the world away but we don't, we get up & we face that day & we go head to head with all the challenges that this horrible disease throws at us...I pray that things will get better for you & your partner & always remember..you are not alone.. Sending hugs your way.. sunshine 🙂
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