HOW TO DEAL WITH A LOVE ONE'S ANGER?

[CJ1]

I understand completely how you feel. Im dealing my wife was ovarian cancer and her anger is really tough.  

[CJ1]

We'll put , I have my Christian faith but I am also human and I've been dealing with being a verbal punching bag for 4 years on and off as my wife battles ovarian cancer 3 recurrences. I really can't take much more of it mentally.

[Traci-Renee]

Stay strong CJ1.  Know you are not alone.  It is so hard on us caregivers, watching our loved ones hurt.  But then they hurt us more by words.  How much are we suppose to take.  Hey I guess this is why this website was made, so we all could vent our pain to each other.  Here if you need to talk.  😊

[CJ1]

Thank you so much like you said sometimes the power of knowing you're not alone means so much when you're in this situation.

[Traci-Renee]

Cj1,  

Know your not alone.  Some days just feel like to much to handle.  Other days I just sit and shake my head, and say this doesn’t even look like or resemble my life.  Then other days I get a little glimpse of what use to be.  But we all have to concentrate on today.  I’m so sorry you’ve been going thru this for so long.  I live in the Boston area, with Great hospitals.  Where do you and your wife live?  Do you guys have kids?  Listen stay strong, I know how hard it is, and with Corvid mixed in this...ugh!!!

[CJ1]

Hi , no kids. She always struggled with depression a little but this last recurrence is the worst I have seen and she doesn't understand and always want to take meds for depression but they are going have to give something and pray she will take it. It breaking my heart to see her say she doesn't want to fight it anymore and would rather die and moods up and down at me. I have to take care of myself also. Praying like a warrior 🙏

[Traci-Renee]

Cj1, 

im so sorry.  Yes, you do have to take care of yourself also.  It’s funny I say that to everyone but am the last to take my own advice.  I have 3 kids.  My daughter is 23, then two boys 20,17.  It’s so hard.  If I’m not getting rude comments from him or meanness if I don’t just act and be quiet, but yet just do what I’m suppose to do and if I argue back then I get it from the kids.  I’m just suppose to act like I’m so happy with everything.  Even my marriage doesn’t feel like a marriage anymore, if that makes any sense.  You didn’t say where you live?  How long have you been married.  I can honestly understand her depression, which nobody should be embarrassed about.  She has been thru so much, as well as you.  I just feel like I’m like the walking dead these days.  I feel like nobody cares how I feel.  Just put on a pretty face and smile.  It’s getting harder and I know yet things will get harder.  I can’t even express how I feel these days.  I am a big smiler, I like to smile and laugh, yet I feel like I’m broken...life has been sucked out of me.  I want my life back....💔 I don’t mean to sound selfish bc I am totally not. I’m not materialistic either.  I just want to feel loved and happy.  I bet you feel the same...we all do!!! If anyone one says different you are a 🤥 liar...

[Traci-Renee]

Hi Cj1, hoping you had a better day, and your wife was more comfortable today.  Thinking of you both.  Traci-Renee

[Traci-Renee]

hi Cj1, just wanted to check and see how you and your wife are doing.  I am praying for you both.  

[Ralph1968]

Dear EM74,

I am going through the exact same thing with my wife.  She was diagnosed with Stage 4 Breast Cancer in Jan. 2021.  She has treated me very poorly and it hurts.  I love her so much and I'm trying to be patient.  She has said that she is leaving and when I try to speak with her she gets very angry and says such terrible things.  This isn't my wife...I don't know who this is.  I just want to love and support the woman that I married 25 years ago.  She's everything to me.  I am trying to be patient and 99% of the time I am...but I'm human too and all I'm trying to do is love and support her.  Hang on EM74.