Hi first of all hugs and more hugs to you. I am a carer of my husband who has stage 4 prostate cancer and we are heading to the oncologist today . My story is a little different but similar. My hubby doesnt get angry but doesnt communicate sometimes he lives with his head in the sand , Decides that its ok to forget it meds. He drinks to much. Very frustrating . What I did was chat to his oncologist about his relunctance to take control of his treatment. I also decided that as a carer I was going to still be his wife not his nurse and that he was an adult and his choices are his choices , I also decided that I had to take care of me, selfish as it might seem but for me to deal with this desease and we to as carers are affected we might not have cancer but my gosdit affects us, I had to be fine mentally and physically. I continue to do things for myself by doing this it gives my hubby time to himself, I think as wives we want to be there all the time to make it right ,we hover we nag we want them to fight, May be he wants space time out .]to not think about cancer , I have told my hubby about support groups but didnt tell him to join, his choice right , I also joined the telephone suppot group through the cancer council its for carers and have group councilly every fortnight ,I go to the bedroom shut the door and its my turn to talk about how I feel about stratgergies listen to other ppl in the same situation and how they deal with it, and sometimes just knowing that you are not alone and its alright and that yes it normal for all these feelings and sometimes there is no answer it sort of makes it easier. I also just go up to my hubby and say I need a hug and I am scared .Just had a thought I think the the Vet affairs have support groups as well you could google it . Men arrrrg Cancer arrrg stubbornest arggggggg anger arggggg .PS thats me screaming . Hugs again look after you .Keep up withthe support groups writing everything down is also a release.
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