I too have a pillow to cuddle! Hugs to you and your boys. ... View more

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Hi. For as long as you have options it is not the end. Having said that though I agree with wombat4 - live each day best you can. While you are chasing down options to give your partner more time dont forget to cherish the time you have right now. I lost my husband to GBM in 2009. It was only when his tumour recurred that we decided it was time to build up the memory bank for our girls. We continued our fight against this dreadful disease but also started spending more time getting the most out of each day. Unfortunately with this disease things can change very quickly so cherish today. ... View more

Hi Mrs Elton Grief is a funny thing isn't it? Our loved ones have moved on and we feel guilty about moving forward. I had to move house six months after hubby passed. When the purchase of the new house settled I was overwhelmed with sadness because this is my house not ours. Whenever I feel I am letting him down I have a conversation in my head with him and most times he tells me to get over myself. :) Greg definitely would not mind you getting a new bed and the new cover and is probably laughing at the number of cushions you have added. Two years and 3 months later I still sleep only on my side of the bed and I still wish my hubby goodnight every night. Some habits are harder to change. This may sound corny but I eventually overcame my sleep issues becuase I realised that love survives death. He is gone but so many things remind me every day as to how much he loves me. As with all things it will take time but eventually we all heal. Hugs ... View more

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Hi. I am sorry you are having such a tough time. I know exactly what you are going through having gone through it myself two years ago. My husband was diagnosed with GBM in Feb 2009 and we lost him to GBM in Dec 09. Yes we too got to the point where nothing I did was good enough. What I did when I was close to losing it was to sit him down and point out to him that he had been using me as his verbal punching bag. I told him that I was not on the opposing team, I was on his team. I also pointed out that whether he realised it or not I was his main supporter. He had siblings but noone volunteered to go to appointments. I told him how I thought he must be feeling and then I asked him to put himself in my shoes. I realised that because of his illness we had stopped communicating because everything had become about his next scan and his next chemo treatment. Until I had my talk with my husband he did not even realise what he was doing. He was reacting by shutting himself in his little bubble. Things improved after that. I am not saying one fix fits all. I am just telling you my story and hoping it helps a little. ... View more

Hi Bee I lost hubby to GBM (brain tumour) in Dec 09. When he was in paliative care, my little girls (3 and 9 at the time) did some finger printing with their dad. They used their fingers and their dad's fingers and some paint to make prints of butterflies and flowers on canvas. He had lost quite a lot of mobility by then (could not hold a spoon or a pen) but he managed that activity with the girls' help. This has become the girls' favourite memento. It was fun and light hearted when we did it. I send best wishes to Midnight Cupcake and her family. Jill, I like your idea of the quilt. I found an American site that makes teddy bears out of loved ones clothes and that's what I have done for the girls. They picked items of his clothing that they have a fond attachment to and I had these made into a teddy bear for each of them. Regards ST ... View more

Hi Melissa Sending you a hug. Just think...every day your dad hangs on is his way of saying "I love you too". They fight so hard to hang on no matter how much they have deteriorated. Also, he may not be able to talk but he can hear you so dont leave anything unsaid. Take care of you. ST ... View more

Smiley As you said earlier you have a good medical team and they will help you through each phase. Towards the end, we were put in the care of the palliative team who were very supportive and kept my husband comfortable. There was pain but only for a short period as they adjusted pain meds. There is a website maintained by a nurse whose father had GBM which goes through what to expect towards the end. It helped me accept the changes in my husband towards the end and I was better prepared for what was to come. I would not read it too early on though because you may then panic and read too much into your husband's symptoms. Let me know if you'd like the website address and I will send in to you by private msg. ST ... View more

Hi Smiley You have probably read my story above. I lost my husband to GBM in Dec09 after a short 10 month battle. My girls were 9 and 3 at the time. I totally understand what you are going through...watching your partner change because of the tumour, watching him try to get his head around the fact that it is terminal, worrying about the kids, worrying about whether you will be alright...worrying about everything really. The one phrase I still hate is "you are so strong". Given a choice I dont want to have to be strong. Well, its now coming up to 17 months since we lost him and I must say the girls have surprised me along the way with their resilience. It is not always smooth sailing but your relationship with your kids post cancer will be the same as what it was before cancer. It probably took about 4-5 months for the initial shock to wear off for me and for the instant replay in my head of his last couple of weeks to stop playing. But yes, I can now appreciate the influence he had on my life. I miss him a lot but I now recall good memories. We were married for 12 years and it amazing how much I had changed in those years without realising it. My word of advice...if you want it...stop worrying about the what ifs or about next week or next month...enjoy today. In his last few months we took a family trip and that's the girls lasting memory...the effort he made to be there. Mine is the daily time we had in the car to chat. He wanted to work and so he did up to a month before he passed but because he could nolonger drive I drove him. It was an hour each way and its those hours I remember now, not the time waiting for scans or the multiple trips to the ER. Its cliche but yes time (sometimes a lot of it) does heal some wounds. Thinking of you and wishing you well. ST ... View more