Hi Lisa
I was very sorry and saddened to read that you have become a widower at such a young age. Yes it will be difficult for quite a while, but you will always have your memories which no one can ever take from you. Remember the fun times, the good times before cancer reared its ugly head and live in the knowledge that your husband is no longer suffering. Cry as much as you want, crying is good - after my Dad was taken by cancer, I think I shed a lifetime of tears; I never thought I would recover from his death , but I did - took quite a while but I made myself think that Dad would not want me to be so sad.
He would have wanted me to go on living and remembering our good times - it worked for me - try it, don't expect it to happen overnight - but you will recover and find comfort.
As others have said- use this site - it really is a great way of healing and finding comfort - we have all been through and are going through some horrible experiences so we all do understand.
Take care of yourself and do something nice for yourself that you can imagine your husband wanting for you.xx