Living alone with Cancer and Depression

[Cindi54]

Hi @Jennifer66 ,

Oh I'm sorry, you sure are getting kicked around but your specialist sounds wonderful, sounds like he's doing everything possible for you.

I so hope this new treatment shows some promise, you need some luck.

I don't know really if they know if any cancer sells too small to see have entered my bladder, or other places, but hope my chemo treatment kills any. I'll find out in a couple of months when I have one of those cyctoscopy I think it's called where doc checks out the bladder? and ct scan.

Then if things looking good I'll follow up with ct scans every few months then 6 monthly to see if it returns as mine was a very aggressive tumor.

But who knows? it sure is a waiting game isn't it. Lets try to be positive.

I feel for you Jennifer.

Which state are you in?

xx😘

[Richard56]

Hi Cindi,

I had my appointment with the Onc this morning , I start my Induction BCG treatment on the 4th of Nov, that will be every Monday for 6 weeks, then in Jan my surgeon will have a look and see, if that's clear it will be every 3 weeks for 6 mths, with look and see every months.

As you know its constant surveillance .

How do you feel today, thinking about you and the treatment you had yesterday. 

Hugs ,

Richard xx

[Jennifer66]

Hi cindi54

haha!! No not at all am I been kicked around, my professor is wonderful and is doing his best for me, I guess I make it hard for him as I don’t take it seriously 

I’m not having any new treatments, the three cystoscopy ureteroscopy and Turbts and stent changes I’ve had this year are my treatments 

my cancer is also high grade aggressive being a T1G3

As my cancer constantly returning I do have to look at major surgery as 20% success I feel is not worth considering, but like you say, who knows unfortunately as my professor is telling me my waiting is up! 
I am definitely not positive as I feel the devastation when this is a let down and I’m absolutely not negative I simply  like to sit in the middle and hope for the best 

and simply try hard not to overthink 

[Jennifer66]

Hi Richard56

thats is good your treatment is starting 

I went through 12 treatments weekly of BCG and had no problems at all just a little achy and tired after but the next morning all good, my immune responded really well and worked slowly 

it’s a good procedure 

so good thoughts with you 

[Richard56]

Hi Jennifer, 

Thanks for your message,  thats reassuring that it's not too bad.

My immune system is not that good for some reason this year, my GP is unsure what is going on with my system, I've had so many blood and urine tests which haven't indicated anything sinister apart from the bladder cancer,  I now suffer from dehydration and dry mouth syndrome which is painful all of the time, and nothing seems to help, anyway I'll keep investigating. 

I've read that you're going through so much, goodness me, you are so brave and my thoughts are with you all of the time, and wish you better. 

Take care,

We'll talk soon,

Hugs xx

Richard 

[Cindi54]

Hi @Richard56 ,

I'm so happy for you that you have a plan sorted, sounds good.

You can actually buy stuff from chemist for dry mouth , a spray I think that helps, you should ask at a chemists? maybe?

Talk soon, I'm tired today so going for a nap but side affects not too bad.

all the best,

Cindi x

[Jennifer66]

Hi Richard56

Thanks for your kind words, we are all going through this in our own way with different cancers in different ways 

BCG gets your immune system working so  your immune should fire up and may help you a lot 

I do have aggressive T1G3 bladder cancer and ureter cancer with a stent, I have no pain and wouldn’t even think I have cancer and the reason I delay surgeries as I possibly don’t take it too serious, however that doesn’t stop my brain at night thinking and I do know I have to more serious as my options are limited 

wishing you well with your treatments 

[Cindi54]

Hi @Jennifer66 ,

I'm so glad your Professor is so wonderful, are you going to trust in his suggestions?

It is very hard but holding onto your life may be more important than retaining your bladder?

If that IS the best decision to give you the best chance.

Oh Jenny, I don't know, but please listen to your Prof, he will know the best decision?

Glad you're not being negative, it's all so hard, wish you were in Sydney, maybe we could have met up sometime for moral support, although since my last chemo last Thursday I've had no energy at all and find it hard to do anything let alone drive anywhere, I'm so spun out and dizzy all the time.

But I'll keep going, hoping each day that tomorrow's better.

NEVER give up!!😘

xx

[Jennifer66]

Hi Cindi54

thank you, you always have lovely words to say 

you certainly have  gone through a not very pleasant treatment, I do hope you are starting to feel better 

hopefully I will have an appointment this week or next with biopsies results and best way forward, and the professor does give options, although only two are left with one relying on biopsy results to see if even an option, we are looking at major surgery as best way forward

how good would it be to be in same states for a moral support catch-up, I feel to be both going through the worst times of our lives which no one can truly understand unless you are in that situation, my cancer and surgeries are so ‘unseen’ as I’m always told how well and good I look, which does nothing for how l actually feel and to have someone going through the same would be such a great support

have a good week lovely you are such a strong support and strong human 💖💖 

[Cindi54]

Hi @Jennifer66 ,

Thank you so much for such kind words and yes I agree with you about how no one really knows what we are going through unless they've been there,I also get the " how good I look" which is so opposite to how I feel, but I guess people just don't know what to say, some seem to retreat from me and keep away probably because they don't know how to handle it ( like my sister😞, she has really distanced herself from me) but surprisingly a good friend of hers has cancer and we have become close.

Sad but everyone's different.

Good luck with your results,

xxxx