The flashbacks are hard. I am still stuck in difficult memories of Mum and hoping time will heal. I feel sure that this little grandson will be told all about your dad, and hopefully the little one will grow up feeling a strong connection and love even in his absence. Hugs.   ... View more

The brain is so connected to personality and it is not surprising that you are noticing a change. Whether it is the disease or side effects from treatment is sometimes hard to tell. My Mum passed away this year after a four year battle with lung cancer that led to brain and spinal secondaries. It is understandable that you have become numb. You are grieving. You have a sense of loss already in the way your loved one and your relationship has changed. You may also be experiencing grief in anticipation of possible final loss. Find strength in this community... you are not alone...My heart broke long before Mum died, but I acknowledge that I was fortunate to have a supportive network of family and friends. Is it possible that the friends you have lost contact with would love to reconnect if they knew you needed their support? Is there a cancer support group attached to your boyfriend's treatment centre? There is no easy answer to the fear of being alone when an incredibly important relationship is changing. But don't let it rob you of the opportunity to be living and loving the moment with your boyfriend now. Sending up a prayer for you as you go through this tough time. ... View more

Rosie, I hope you can get some rest and perspective on this soon. Like you I have 2 sisters. Although working full time, I have always tried to do as much as I could to support Dad with Mum's care. Because I love her, but also I think because it made me feel safer. It gave me a sense of control over an uncontrollable situation. Like your Mum, my Mum is now coming to the end of her long cancer battle, but with some extra challenges in my life, I have had to step back and accept an increasing role by my sisters. Is it possible for you to do this too? Is your Mum excited about your uni enrolment? Would it give her pleasure to see you fulfilling a dream before she passes? It sounds like you find it hard to justify doing things for yourself, perhaps it might help if you viewed it as an opportunity to make your Mum happy. It is certainly not a selfish act. If you think it will just be too much for mow, them defer your course. But remember, deferring uni is not going to change your Mum's reality. Perhaps stepping back a bit will help you prepare for life without mum. Maybe there are others who would cherish the blessing of time with mum while you are at uni. Only you can make the decision. Just breathe. It sounds like you have been an amazing support. Keep journaling your thoughts and emotions and know that this site is a safe and caring space for you. Big decisions are incredibly difficult to make when emotions are in turmoil, but you are a fighter. You have fought for your Mum's survival for five years, when you are ready you will also know how to fight for your future happiness. Just breathe. ... View more

So pleased to hear that things are progressing well for you George! Your positive attitude is such an asset, and I believe the people you are interacting with as your treatments progress, and those of us who read your optimistic posts, are really helped and encouraged by that. Look forward to hearing more good things as you enter this second half of your treatments! 🙂 ... View more

I am sorry to hear of your husband's painful illness, and of the effects it has had on you all in different ways.How drained you must all feel after such an intense few months. Perhaps your hospital or specialists may be able to refer your husband to an Occupational Therapist who could assess and discuss his current needs for safety and assistance? Perhaps hiring a bed rail from an equipment supplier may help interrupt night time walking? I am not familiar with burns care, but the fluid loss and delirium and wakefulness sound like issues that require ongoing, careful medical advice and oversight. Perhaps you could ring a major hospital's health advice line for some immediate direction or request some community nursing visits? I hope you have people around that are able to encourage and support you all. If people offer to help perhaps they can sit and chat with your husband while you get some rest or respite for a little while each day.My Mum had a stay in hospital recently where her mobility,alertness and safety were an issue. We took turns to sleep by her bedside, sleeping lightly to be ready for her if she made a move to get out of bed, very thankful for the hospital bed rails. It wasn't easy nor sustainable, and I feel for you if this sounds like an ongoing reality in your home. Thankfully some medication changes improved her mobility issues and she is home. Dad takes care to make sure she is fairly central to their shared bed, and they do have a small bed rail. Although he does still sleep fairly lightly, he is fortunate that her night time waking has become less frequent and more predictable, which has made it easier.Praying you get good rest and medical direction soon. ... View more

Hi May, I am sorry to hear that you have had difficult news. How wonderful that he had seven clear years, but what a shock and disappointment it must be for you both to process and prepare for another experience with illness. Hope you find this site helpful, and that you can draw strength from others as you support your hubby. Take care. ... View more