Good to hear from you Dunedigger. Glad that the 5FU is havinig an effect. Get out there in the bush and that can only help everything else. Keep us posted as you are one of the many inspirations for me on this site. Next CEA's etc for me are due in March but so far all is good. Samex ... View more

Beautiful words Sailor. I hope you had a lovely day. Your song reminds me of how young Jessica must be faring out at sea alone. S ... View more

And to you Julie. For those of us who are at home with our family and friends - enjoy!! For those who are struggling - hugs and best thoughts. S ... View more

Hi guys - Charmaine and Smilesonly, Couldn't agree more with the above. I wish that I had contacted professional advice when I first finished treatment. I just thought I was weak and bonkers when life didn't return to normal immediately. Even nearly 2 years down the track I struggle at times. However, even though the shadow (as Sailor so effectively calls it) is in a smaller place than it was, my New Year's resolution is to see my GP and start some counselling. I have had a bad week of tears and not coping with the trivial and mundane tasks at all well - time for some help! BAck to your thoughts and away from mine - the thoughts become less invasive but the monsters do still pop up when you least expect it. My problem is not dealing with the diagnosis of someone else and the fear returns with a vengeance. I believe that you MUSt talk about it to someone who is willing to listen or you will go bonkers. This site has been great for me in this regard. I'm sure that it was Sailor who commented on another blog that we don't cope but we manage our living with cancer and when we are able to manage a little better then the gremlins become less invasive. On a personal note - I had a very impromptu trip to New York with a friend in October and the rushing around with that helped me to think that I can get on with some of the things in my life and that every minute is precious. Even the preparations were fun because it was different. Be kind to yourself and TALK!! S ... View more

Hi Jill, Your experience unfortunately takes me back 5 years ago when cancer first hit my immediate friendship group and a wonderful friend was in your situation with her husband.Consequently I only have more cyber hugs to offer and cancer certainly sux anytime but this time is the worst. Allow the following days to unfold and as long as the kids have their pressies and enough chocolate they'll be happy at this stage and the grownups can just manage and be grateful for the time as this is what is important. Lots of hugs, S ... View more

Hi, When I was having chemo I overheard a similar response from a grandchild who was accompanying his mother and grandfather. Mum spent a lot on food from the cafeteria that day! Maybe the boys were expecting Star Wars. Take it easy Samex ... View more

I think Bugger, bugger, bugger is more than appropriate. I know my Dad has a small hissy fit whenever his PSA is slightly elevated . When I had a slightly elevated LFT (liver function)my GP ordered it to be redone. He rang me at work and said I needed it to be done that day - needless to say tears and cups of tea were in order.When I then saw the onologist, it was within range and my GP was just being extra cautious. Enjoy the scotch and I would love to say "don't worry" and know that you will take it on board but unfortunately we all know that sometimes that doesn't happen. I'm going with slightly elevated will be a glitch. Enjoy Chrissy and go into the backyard and scream 'bugger' as much as you like. Glad the blog was sorted before I wen to bed as I would have worried all night as well! Take care, S ... View more

Hi Willow, Dealing with your Mum and Dad must be awfully difficult as well. I am lucky in that while they are elderly my parents are doing really well (Dad had prostate cancer but has it under control despite some radiation side effects). I am currently working on a piece of writing dealing with the sense of being cut adrift and having the sense of looking at aspects of life from the outside. Not for publication yet but soon. See if your boss can give you the time off. Maybe you can use your parents situation as well as your own for a rationale? While I have been doing really well lately i had an awful day on SUnday - tears all day. I think the time has come for me to see a professional too. Take care and I'm glad things are calmer. S ... View more

Ditto from me Sailor? ... View more

I have just read this series of comments and a smile did I have!! Happy birthday Cats! I may be a little late but as my brother says with my birthdays - milk it! I hope that you did somehting nutty and wonderful. When on treatment, my best friend was my jack russel x something - aka Spud the Wonder Dog. She listened to my complaints and tears without judgement and was always there to snore with me on the lounge at nanna nap time. Ahh SAilor, methinks you are too harsh on yourself in quoting Prufrock - never a fool. I would love to go to a jellicle ball. Enjoy the lead up to Chrissy one and all, Samex ... View more