September 2009
Hiya Mary
Seems that harker has addressed you very well. I just wanted to say hi and welcome.
Julie
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September 2009
Hi lydia
I am a bit of a fossil but i have just finished chemo and am currently sporting the non hair look! Would you believe my best friend is a hairdresser?
Cancer can be very frustrating and i think all of us would have experienced that at times in our journies.
Julie
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September 2009
Hiya wazzy
I just wanted to wish you luck and hope that someone can help you.
Julie
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thanks teacher mum and larn75 ... its one of my all time favs and i just couldnt resist!
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A young man named John received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity.
John tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to "clean up" the bird's vocabulary. Finally, John was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even ruder. John, in desperation, threw up his hand, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute. Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer. The parrot calmly stepped out onto John's outstretched arms and said "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior. John was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude. As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird continued, "May I ask what the turkey did?"
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September 2009
Hey samex
Thanks for you reply.
I used to have the fear of having to face it all again, that slowly faded with time. Yet here i am now doing exactly that and although some of the 2nd time around is somewhat surreal at the moment in some ways it is just easier. I know what i am going through is just natural and normal, there is no angst ... it is difficult to explain. I have been thinking on this subject recently and havent come up with a good explanation yet other than it is easier. Which i think relates specifically to the discussion which started this interaction.
Thanks re the sane bit also, guess i was a bit nervous as i have not posted in a forum before.
I do believe that any situation no matter how bad, good can and does come out of it ... sometimes you just have to look.
Julie
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September 2009
Hiya Samex
I can remember going through the same thing that you are currently going through. Time is an increible healer. The uncertainty and fear fades, at least i found that it did with time.
This time i am dealing with a cancer that is somewhat related to my last cancer but it is different also. One would think my experiences would be similar and yet this time because i am allowing myself to address all emotions and to not feel guilty or any angst at all it is easier. I am finding that i come back when i am ready to fight the fight (just my way of viewing it) and in fact i am energised and just ready to do battle once again.
I said to someone recently who was on the "positive" track that we are not 100% positive when we dont have cancer why should it be different? It is not natural or normal to be positive 100% of the time!!
What we perceive to be negative thoughts necessarily dont need to be. We can turn the negative into positives. For instance if i am angry i hate my cancer, thereby allowing myself to feel the negative but in my mind it is now a positive because it is part of how i fight the cancer.
Maybe i am strange, i dont know .. i just know what works for me and how, as i have said before that this time it is so much easier. In a way it feels a little strange.
Regards
Julie
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September 2009
Being caught up in the trap of having to be positive all the time is just an awful place to be. The first time i had cancer i was on that road and this time i am doing it differently. Whilst i believe positivity is a good thing so is addressing the gamut of other emotions we experience along the way. The way i see it is that by addressing other emotions we give ourselves energy and clarity to be able to be positive.
One thing that i have found incredibly effective for me is to give myself permission to have down time and to time limit the amount of time i am down. Usually i am ready to come back out and face the world before my time is up.
Julie
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September 2009
Hey Mel
Yanno i can totally relate to what you are saying about the future/health/recurrence. I had that concern last time i had cancer. I guess really it is a little like the day or night before we are told the "news". At least for me it is/was? I had this recurring question "how will i handle it if i am told i have cancer?". Handle it i did, i dont see that the alternatives are such a great or healthy choice. Now i have come to the conclusion i will deal with what i need to deal with when it comes up. Kind of like, keep the past in the past and tomorrow where it should be and then just deal with "what is". Dunno, that there is any magical remedy but that is how i do it. :)
Julie
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