Hi, I have learnt one thing about cancer treatment and that is if you dont click with your oncologist change immediately. I persisted with the lady I was with and she would not do things I wanted it was her way or the highway. I have recently spoken to another oncologist and he has told me it was possible to get the treatment the way i wanted. I should have changed early. You must also remember its your body. they wanted to pull all my teeth out before radiation and I said no. three years later they are still in my head. you must trust your instincts and do what you feel is right for you. dont be bullied by your doctors. get them to explain and take your time , ask lots of questions till you are satisfied. I have learnt a lot over the last four years as I was given 9 months to live if I did not have treatment after the head and neck cancer spread to my lungs. three years later its starting to get a bit knarly but the palliative care team are great. Good luck with what ever you decide and I am also scared its normal to be. find some sort of outlet , writing, singing, screaming walking who knows. I am 68 and doubt I will make it to 69, but who knows I just take each day at a time and write lots of stuff to get it out of my system. Doug
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