About BJS

Mrs_Elton

Barbara, My sincere condolences to you on the passing of your beloved John. Cancer is cruel. Love is eternal. Sending you love and strength in the days, weeks, months and years ahead. Kind regards, Jill (I apologize for the delay in passing on my condolences, I rarely come on this site anymore, but had the urge to do so tonight).

SILLY

I imagine you treasure birthdays and other special events if there is a chance each may be your last.You must be experiencing a lot of different emotions at different times but concentrating on good times,good emotions ,making the rest of your time together as happy as can be .Perhaps you are reminescing a lot too,remembering some important and some unimportant events, sometimes unsure which one of you is correct about the details. Most of all I imagine you are doing all to help hubby to be peaceful and painfree. My thoughts are with you.

BJS

My husband spent 11 hours at the hospital last Friday having tests etc in an endeavour to get into a clinical trial. The doctor phoned today & said at the moment they don't think he's fit enough to go on the trial! (How fit do they expect him to be? He's had cancer for over a year!!!) Even before cancer my husband wasn't what you would class as an active person, he had retired from work & his days mostly consisted of sitting in front of the TV! I know in his state having chemo would probably set him back even more but they're taking away his one hope of treatment that could maybe prolong his life! His Oncologist seemed very keen on him doing the clinical trial & didn't offer much in the way of alternative treatment. Where do we go from here??

BJS

Thanks for your replies & suggestions - much appreciated.

Rachel_C

I agree with you about feeling like your life is in limbo, I have been living with smouldering Myeloma for the past 3 years and last year I had a stem cell transplant. This diagnosis and subsequent treatment threw our lives into turmoil. We had planned once our children had finished school we would do some things for ourselves, travel etc. I had to take five months off work during treatment and recovery and now I cannot be immunised until October, so all our plans are also in limbo. We have been taking short breaks instead, going to lovely coastal B and B's, travelling to Sydney to visit friends and staying in acccomodation instead of with relatives. This may be how it will have to be for the moment, finding enjoyment in different ways. The little things in life become so much more important. I always felt sorry that my husband and children had to take this awful journey me but I was so thankful they were there to support me. Your husband really appreciates all your love and support and Europe will be there when he recovers. My best wishes to you both, try to stay strong Rachel C

Hi BJS The Cancer Council can and will provide you with general information. From my own experience the information we have received was hardly at the high-school level. For instance, I've advised the dietitian that my partner takes protein in powder form. She asked for the brand name. When I said, ON Whey Protein - she said she never heard of it. It is the best protein out there, and it can be confirmed on a number of websites across the globe (Whey Protein Reviews for instance). A very popular product with hardly any sugar in it. Instead she recommended Proform protein with 41% sugar in it!!! She even ran down a few floors to get us a tab for free. To this day we have not opened it and we do not intend to do so. I am not trying to imply anything here rather than you need to find someone who is really knowledgeable about these things and who you think can give the best advice on any question you may have. Certainly the lady we met knew something but to my taste it was not satisfactory. The protein issue was just one example. She never ever heard of kefir, or psyllium husk for example, and the list could go on. Good luck.

oldhippy

Hey - I am slowly coming to the realisation that there is no "Guide Book" to all this - its a primordial soup, so much depends on the individual. Its a bit like the Medieval theologians arguing how many Angles could dance on the head of a pin. Feral cells with their own free will, battling it out with whatever can be thrown at them... - whatever makes sense to you. Oncologists dont lie, they just dont know. Period. In the meantime, both of you, LIVE. Cram as much living into life as you can, most people dont get this chance. Do the trips, go bush, learn to skydive - review your bucket list. Stop wasting time on crap that you cant resolve anyway. Just go for it. Dance naked in the rain if you want to - (said this to my wife a few nights ago - she said "no - and close the window, there's a draft"....bugger....have to work on that one... I wish you both well, be of good heart it will all eventually be resolved.

Re: RIP My beloved

Re: Another day to celebrate

Where do we go from here!

Re: Looking for a good doctor

Re: My thoughts about cancer

Re: How important is diet?

Re: Out of my depth

Connect

More information

Join the community

Want to join the discussion?