I was diagnosed with breast cancer early 2017, underwent a lumpectomy and 30 rounds of radiation. A few months later i collapsed and was found to have bacterial meningitis, sepsis and pneumonia. I spent 3 weeks unconscious and on life support and had to teach myself to eat, talk and walk again.  Following some tumultuous time at work which resulted in some time off, i am returning next week with some trepidation.  My whole point in writing this is to ask for some pointers after everything ive been through to allow my husband to get close to me on an intimate level. Any ideas? ... View more

How does someone reconcile in their own mind the loss of a close relative with the same disease that they themselves are going through? We lost a very dear family member at the beginning of the week through advanced breast cancer that had metastasized to her liver and her bones. She had been given only 48 hours at best last weekend to live. And she didnt even get that. How do i work through 1) the guilt that im feeling that she lost her battle and yet here i am having been diagnosed in January with breast cancer and yet i am alive? 2) the thought of death and how haunting it is for me even though im nowhere near it yet and so on and so on.   Im at a loss now and cannot seem to get past this last week or so emotionally. I know it is not ideal for me in my current health condition but i cant seem to shake what has happened....... thoughts? ... View more

After 2 surgeries for breast cancer to remove the tumour i cleared the margins .... so no node involvement and now just awaiting radiation start date. However a relative that i have formed a close bond with throughout all of this who has also got breast cancer which has metastasized has been sent home from hospital after being told there is nothing more that can be done for her. We received a phone call today to be told she has only got 1 to 2 weeks to go if that. How does one cope with all of this when you are going through your own health issues at the same time? ... View more

I received my diagnosis four weeks ago ..... breast cancer ..... contained they think ... had biopsy and lumpectomy..... usuals .... 2 ops in 4 days later was discharged yesterday.... finding it all very difficult ...  husband and i argued yesterday. He said he had enough of all this stuff .... it was too much for him. Medical oncologist rang asking to see me today. I get in the shower this morning after removing the binding they had me in and dissolve in tears ...... im covered in bruising and bloodied dressings from the surgeries. I thought i would have a good day when i woke this morning ...... and now my mind is clouded with all this stuff ..... is this life as i am to know it for the near future? ... View more

I had a lumpectomy at the beginning of the week as well as 3 nodes removed to help ascertain margins .... then i was discharged the following day. Today i woke up to my breast being rock hard and very painful. As an appointment was scheduled with surgeon today, i saw her and was readmitted immediately as i had developed internal bleeding overnight. As a result 500ml blood was drained with further small cancer specks removed. So 2 ops within 4 days. Im also told that in addition to radiation, (something that I knew previously) that i will need chemo too.  Things are no longer a hell of a shock to me. I shed tears silently and also in public .... i let people embrace me etc but i know im tired of the needles and feeling overwhelmed and the invasion of my privacy. How much do i crave a somewhat normal life ...... What on earth did i do to have to go through this ? What did we all do ? ... View more

Am i going insane or what? Where do you draw the line between blaming something or someone for getting this OR saying to yourself that nothing you did caused this..... that it just happened? Im finding it difficult to accept that i have cancer when i feel well but just tired. Is this part of the acceptance process of having cancer?   My surgery is scheduled for next week and im just finding it very very difficult to face right now. ... View more

I found out 2 days ago .... malignant breast cancer .... so far 1 breast affected .... no lymph nodes .... awaiting specialist appointment  this week ... devastated more than words can say ... View more