It is the eve before I start my chemo journey and it seems surreal. Tonight feels just like every other night, and I don't know whether I'm in denial.    Am I anxious? Yes. Am I downplaying how I really feel? More than likely. I guess I'm desensitized. A little over 2 months ago I was told I would be having major Op to have my right ovary removed due to a large tumour which was later confirmed as Dysgerminoma, stage 1C3. Chemo is purely precautionary. I doubted whether I was making the right decision to pursue chemo. Possible unnecessary toxicity and the lasting effects I could avoid by just assuming all was removed with my ovary.    The endless scans and bloods before and after my diagnosis, recovery from my laparotomy and the giant vertical scar I now bare which has keloid and disfigured me, daily hormone injections, internals scans and blood leading up to fertility preservation procedure that followed. I don't have kids but the idea is growing on me more now at the age of 33. I can't imagine the option being stripped from me because of chemo.    I'm tired from all this and tired for what's to come. I guess I just need someone to talk to every now and then and maybe tell me I've  made the right decision...  maybe.    S.  ... View more