Mate, I think your fight now is as much psychological as it is physical.
I hope that your prognosis improves, I hope that instead of words like 'palliative', words like 'remission' start to creep into doctorly discussion.
BUT, if they don't, I'd gently suggest that you put your hand firmly on the wheel and decide where and how you want the ship to beach itself.
We, none of us, know what comes next, but if you're facing the end of your life - it's not over yet. You still have time. I think if you are resolute in warding off the fatigue, the suffering, the grief, you could make sure that whatever time remains to you (whether it's days, weeks, months or years) has at least some touch of joy and dignity.
It's lovely that you have family with you, and that the medical people are helping manage your pain.
As a fellow cancer sufferer, I know how all of this stuff feels. I'd just urge you to consider that we (all of us) have a dwindling amount of sand in the hourglass. However much time remains to you, I hope that despair doesn't colour it too much. I hope that you can find the mental strength to push through that, and embrace whatever time remains, and take whatever love and happiness you can squeeze out of it.
Enjoy your family, hold their hands, smile at them. Let them read to you if it pleases them. Tell them whatever it is you might need to tell them. Try and be happy from one moment to the next.
And probably stop posting here 🙂
