Gardenia You are a remarkable woman your hugs an dreply have brought a tear to my eye thank you Geoff ... View more

Hi Bus Just noticed you on line Hope your well, you sound "well balanced" with your outlook excuse termology I am gettting tired so time for bed. Regards Geoff ... View more

Hi Gardenia (and others on a like path) My partner has an aggressive brain tumour. Been on the operation radiation/chemo path for the last 4.5 months so not quiet at your stage, but it will eventuate. Hugh hugs for your anguish/resentment. From my perspective and experience, your thoughts are normal, wanting his peace and your release of having to look after him, it happens. If you look closely/deeply enough selfish thoughts are there all the time, we all have them to some degree, and now with you being at a overwhelmed/feed up stage. (especially when there is no time when all this crap will end, a fully spiralling never ending story), they become to your consciousness with a belt. Hugely distressing when we considered ourselves to be giving/caring nurturers giving up more and more of our life time and realise we are really selfish with our own right wanting to chase after “a normal life” whatever that is out there. Its OK, be aware of them, know they will be there for a period (short ?) and go away at some stage only to return again. Guilt is a extreme hard master, in your case mistress, and seriously - the struggles you sound that you are going through are a bitch. I hear your frustration with difficulty getting quality time, but manage it for your sake and your husbands - one grumpy turd in a relationship is enough 2 can be disastrous. Advice that your probably already endured If it gets too much take a hike -- a good brisk walk, run or some type of heavy exercise can take the edge off, and just as you want to be reminded look after yourself no one else will. Regular sleep A good quality and regular daily quiet time meditate pray etc, what ever works for you Ps giving this type of advice will come back to me, I shall be reminded I'm sure (and by a woman hell bent on returning such....shudder to think) Ps Have you spoken to your local community centre - they may provide some respite care. Again huge hugs Geoff ... View more

Wren With your writing skils and insights have you ever thought of doing a journal - for your own therapy and others Just a thought ... View more

There is a trial of a vaccine being undertaken at phase 2/3(?) (which from an old posting in Feb 2010 by the original research doctor indicated that some GBMs have a particular protein and this vaccine has been designed for and so far have had success at starving some of the tumour - my expression so maybe wrong terminology) I believe that the protein could be in up to 40% of GBM sufferers Pfizer was a leader in the trails but returned the rights of rindopepimut (CDX-110) the therapeutic cancer vaccine,in Sept 2010, to Celldex Therapeutics because the drug is “no longer a strategic priority” for the company, raising questions about the viability of the program. Note that I have also just put this comment out in the general comments section "Does any one have any updated knowledge of the trials been undertaken in America of a vaccine CDX-110 for patients with Glioblastoma Multiforme (GBM) brain tumour latest I can access is 24 Feb 2011 by Stanford Medicine It seems to be undertaken in America only" So there is a trial at least being undertaken, and from my perspective, the results look mixed but still only infer some longer life, and only for some people with a tumour with the protein. Being America I guessing that if it does get up and running then it will be expensive. There may be some hope but for who it would be suitable, whether it works and whether it would be available in time ..... Is any one has insights into all this? Regards to all Geoff ... View more

Hi kitkat6478 It sounds really hard for you dealing with your mum, her closing off from you, the hidden crying, tip toeing around. Try contacting the hospital or the sectretary of the doctor, find out if there are any social workers associated with her case or support that may be available for you to talk to (if not for your mum) Some information under The Beyound Blue site under depression - helping others "It's not always easy to help someone who may be experiencing depression. It can be hard to know what to say or do. Below are some tips. •Talk to the person about how they're feeling. •Listen to what the person says - sometimes, when a person wants to talk, they're not always seeking advice, but just need to talk about their concerns. •Maintain eye contact and sit in a relaxed position - positive body language will help both people feel more comfortable. •Use open-ended questions such as "So tell me about...?" which require more than a 'yes' or 'no' answer. This is often a good way to start a conversation. •If conversation becomes difficult or if the person with depression gets angry, stay calm, be firm, fair and consistent and don't lose control. •Often, just spending time with the person lets them know someone cares and understands them. •Encourage the person to seek professional help from their family doctor or a mental health worker. •Take care of yourself. Supporting someone with depression can be demanding. Family and friends should take 'time out' to look after themselves." Dealing with grief - especially long term stuff. Its difficult It can be worked with takes effort and sometimes its too much, sometimes you will fall on you face & why bother. Look for support. Try The Cancer Council 13 1120 where to go for support (I got this from a flyer from Beyond Blue). Life line - some counsellors may not be your bent, some you will 'connect with" on a personal level Hugs for whereever you are Geoff ... View more

Hi I am traveling a similar path, a few steps behind, still a roler coaster of a ride. Operation 3 Feb then the dreaded news of the GBM grade 4 Hugs for your journey whereever you are today Geoff ... View more

Kristella I'm new here, but, shit...your loss of Nick... my thoughts Geoff ... View more

As a kid I used to hanker over the first cut from a roasted leg of lamb & sometimes I got what I wanted. I suppose I could not make the roast so I did not have the choice of when it might come, but when it can my way it sure tasted extra good. Ps The rest of the roast was also good in various ways. I'm more a vego now but remember those days ... View more