I too tend to imagine worst case scenario in most things. But even if you generally don't, cancer has the power to take you there. I reckon there is no more loaded word than cancer but I did not feel this until I was diagnosed. It just has so many connotations and fears attached to it even though some may never apply in every situation. Personally becoming bald really freaked me out as I look terrible in hats etc. As it turns out chemo was never going to be an option as it isn't effective with my kind of cancer anyway. So I got surgery which scares the hell out of me on the day but then you get knocked out and I do like Midazalam. Good luck everyone with whatever occurs and try not to scare the pants off yourself! Cheers GHT ... View more

Hi Dani15 I know what you mean by a whirlwind and the need for support. I had a radical hysterectomy on 30/4/15 this website inc a gyny Group you may find helpful. Check groups on top right of screen and you can request to be a member. The support from other women with similar experiences has been fantastic for me as friends and family don't always know what to say. I really hope you get the best medical care and emotional support thru this crazy cancer roller coaster. Best wishes GHT ... View more

Thanks GHT. I'll look up the gyny cancer group. Your kind words are very much appreciated. Claire ... View more

Hey Tom The waiting and wondering part is a bitch. It is the worst time because the mind wonders. I always try and keep my mind right in the "here and now" and that for me is such an internal struggle and yet it works because I am no longer focussing on the worry, more the keeping the mind in the right place. You sound like you have already been through quite a lot and am not suprised that you are feeling a bit nervous about upcoming surgery. Hope you start to feel a bit better soon. Hang in there! Julie ... View more

Dear April (not a fool just unlucky) This social media stuff is soooo new to me too. I hate the idea of Facebook but this site is the only place I can connect with others with cancer. Thanks for your interest re surgery. My respiratory system tends to shut down under anasthetic. Even Midazalam for short procedures leads to my oxygen sats diving below 90 of course anesthetists and their insurers don't want to pay out so my 20% mortality chance for major surgery (hysterectomy in my case) does their actuarial heads in. Even if hormone therapy reduces the cancer the chance of recurrence is high I think. Also I can't stay on high dose provera long term as it increases chance of heart attack and stroke and breast cancer. Yippee! I hope your gall stone recedes as gall bladder pain is no fun. I had mine out yrs ago but even then I stopped breathing. It was actually very peaceful though. Best wishes GHT ... View more

Hi Adina I am from west aus although had a different cancer to you. What hospital are you being treated at? Most of the hospitals have information of local support groups. I think you can access that information through the social worker at the hospital, your cancer nurse and/or the cancer council. Julie ... View more

Dear Starfishgalaxy I am sorry to hear about your dad. I hope you get to have special time with him during his treatment. It is hard to know who to tell as you never know how they will react and you are hurting so want to self protect. I ended up telling my mum once surgery became unavoidable. She visited briefly in hospital (20 mins) but she hasn't called since to see how I am recovering so my vain hope she would summon some motherly concern proved I was right that she doesn't really care. As for my friend, she isn't even responding to emails. I am hanging on desparately to the hope she will want to remain friends but sometimes I can feel my heart start to break. This year has been all about cancer and the fear of heart break. I am very pi&&ed off with life. Best wishes GHT ... View more

Dear Paul You are right that when a Dr uses the C..... Word things start getting surreal. It is like being on the other side of a line or curtain. Before I was diag in Jan this yr I really had no idea what it really would feel like. I guess now I have to give others a chance to understand even a little but they won't really get it as we do. Being diag on Fri 13 is a bit ironic / freaky. I had an incident on NYE that told me things may be bad so that was freaky / ironic too Know that there really is a big online community here who is with you. I have been very amazed how ppl are so supportive on this site. I decided to join because of no family support and best friend wigging out. I hope you find the support u need among friends, family and here with us fellow journeyers ( is that a word? ) Best wishes GHT ... View more