Hi Bria100717,   I was wondering what the result were for your husband - is it cancer?   There is no excuse for violence at all!  May I suggest you both attend some counselling.   Although your husband may not take kindly to the suggestion, it might help you both.     My father was a violent man after he had a few drinks - which was nearly every day.    We lived on tenterhooks waiting for him to explode if we did something wrong.  Anyway, eventually, my mother filed for a divorce and after that, he did manage to change.  He still drank, but he wasn't violent any more.  My point is that maybe your husband needs a big jolt to get him to change his ways.   I wish you all the best Budgie ... View more

Hi lillian1,   I also have a port in.  One of the best things I've done as my veins are horribly scarred, & getting blood tests done was not fun, with some nurses having as many as 5 attempts to find a vein that they can get blood from.  Now I get my blood tests when I have my port flushed.  Anyway, I digress.  You are probably noticing it more now as the swelling from the procedure has reduced.  I'm sure you have nothing to worry about, but if it concerns you, have it checked out by your GP, or the nurses who give you your treatment.  They should be able to tell if it's normal or not.   All the best  Budgie ... View more

Hi Lindaw,   Try not to worry too much.  I know that's easier said than done, however, it makes life so much more miserable if you worry all the time.   They will be doing the biopsy primarily to find the cause of the mets.  The results will determine the treatment that will be given depending on what the primary is.    Regarding prognosis - everyone is different, and reacts to treatments differently, so really, no-one can give an accurate prognosis.  Even if doctors say people don't have long, or have "x" amount of time, take that with a grain of salt.  While they may give a ballpark figure, it depends alot on the person & their will to survive.   I don't know anything about liver cancer, or what treatments are available for it, so I can't help in that respect, but I hope I've put your mind at ease somewhat, even just a little bit.  Take care.   Budgie ... View more

Hi Caregiver,    I have kidney cancer & Sutent was the first treatment I was on.  Fatigue has been my constant companion since I started on that drug.   I have since been through half a dozen other treatments once they’ve stopped working & the fatigue has always been there.   If you think your husbands dose is too high, you could ask his oncologist if it’s possible to take it one week on, one week off.   It might make a difference.   If that’s not possible, I think the next lowest dose for Sutent is 12.5mg.   That may be an option for him.    Budgie ... View more

Hi sleepless44,   Most older folk do tend to keep this type of info to themselves because they don’t want to be a burden on anyone.   While a death from cancer can be cruel at times, treatment with chemo & radiation, on anyone let alone one of 87 years, can be just as cruel.   Do talk to him about it though as it would probably provide him with some relief, as well as yourself.  But at the end of the day, if your father is of sound mind, it’s his decision one way or another.   Although it’s hard on all concerned, 87 years is a good innings.    Take care   Budgie         ... View more

I’m surprised your dad’s doctors haven’t already got a palliative care team organised for him.  They are a group, or maybe only one person depending on the area you live in, that provide comfort & pain management for people who have a terminal illness or are close to dying.    My pall team are available 24/7 for me to call on if I need them.   They should be able to provide you with links to services to help care for your father as well.   Your dad’s GP or Onc should provide him with a referral to a palliative team near him.    Budgie  ... View more

Hi Daddylittlegirl,   What a terrible situation for your father to be in.  He must be feeling so horrible. No matter what you decide to do, you will probably feel guilt about one thing or another.  It's not right to feel guilty at all!  It's not your fault he has cancer, or for any of the pain he is suffering.  Do not feel guilty about having fun.  Your life matters too, and you can't stop living because of what your father is going through.  Seeing a counsellor is always a good idea, or maybe even just a friend or anyone you can talk to about what is happening.   Whatever you decide, I wish you the best & hope your father is as comfortable as he can be.   Budgie ... View more

I am sorry you’re struggling with this.   Don’t give up trying tho.   I’m sorry I can’t offer any more advice.  All the best to you  Budgie ... View more

The only other thing I can suggest is meditation.   If you haven’t already tried it, it might be worth a shot.    ... View more

Hi SarcomaSlayer,   Have you spoken to your oncologist about how this particular drug is affecting you?  Maybe there is a different chemo they can put you on.  From what I've read on this site, I know it is a big problem with alot of people.   I hope you find a positive way to move forward thru this.   Budgie ... View more