Hi Ben42, I think you did the right thing in reaching out to this group. Friends quite often don't know what to say on the topic of cancer & death, so they don't say anything. For a lot of people death is too confronting & they don't want to put themselves in a position which might make them feel vulnerable or uncomfortable, so they clam up. Then they have less & less contact with you because they know you will want to talk about it. It may be only people who have lost someone who meant a great deal to them that can communicate about death on the same wave length as you. I know it's hard to muster up strength to leave the house, but sitting at home & not venturing out is probably the worst thing you can do. Take a walk in the morning, get some sunshine (before winter sets in) as it's amazing how that can lift the spirits. Go to the library or put your name down to volunteer at a hospital/cancer clinic near you. You never know, you may find it helpful for you to be helping others who are going through what you have been through. Take care of yourself Ben, as life goes on. Best wishes Budgie
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