Blogs - Page 314

Please stop by and read my blogs and see my 'stuff' on Myspace! http://www.myspace.com/serendepityuk Look forward to hearing from you! LLx

When speaking to others about their individual cancer experiences and comparing it to mine (however wrong this is) I am just speechless. To me my experience was no where near as bad as what other people have been through. I want to say thank you for your strength, your courage and your inspiration.

I think in words and phrases, always have. My current irritant is the phrase: "It's not fair" and while I don't think I ever said it myself during my treatment, though I probably had more of a right to than most, I considered it a redundant statement. If life was fair, we'd all look like Angelina Jolie and have her bank balance (and her husband!!)but how dull and uninteresting. "It's not fair" is a juvenile response to a situation and belongs in the pile with "why me? and "it's my turn now".

My day started like most days with a new baby feeding, playing and sleeping. My endocrinologist still had not called with results of the biopsy, but my sub conscious mind was screaming call now! Like most people would I avoided it until I could no longer stand the overwhelming anxiety, it’s amazing how many things you can find to do around the house when you are completely avoiding the inevitable.

This was just my Induction Chemo round!! Duanorubacin Vincristine Prednisolone L-Asparaginase Methotrexate Cyclophosphamide Cytarabin (Ara-C) Mercapotopurine Folinic acid Ondansatron Donperidone Aciclovir Flucloxacillin Fluclonazol Lanzaprazol Norethisterone Septrim Tramadol Paracetamol Metoclopramide Allopurinol Oromorph Piriton Senna Laculose Fleet Quinine MST Midazolam Difflam Mouthwash Corsodyl Nystatin Trimovate Clotrimazole Fusidic Acid Bonjela Cocaine Mouthwash

Using my elbows I worked my spine sideways across the mattress and into a position where I could roll onto my left side. It had been three days since I had tried to stand up on my own. It was bound to hurt, I knew. Working my ankles up the centre of the bed, I forced my knees to flex and move towards the edge. Supporting my weight on my left elbow, which snuggled under the good ribs, I lifted my right shoulder upwards. I paused, knowing that as soon as I pushed off and tried to sit up my right side would feel it.