Overwhelmed - pancreatic cancer stage 4

Angel1
Occasional Contributor

Re: Overwhelmed - pancreatic cancer stage 4

So sorry to hear of your loss. Thinking of you at this sad time of mourning. Take care ❤
Traci-Renee
Frequent Contributor

Re: Overwhelmed - pancreatic cancer stage 4

Hi Angel1, 

I’m so sorry to hear that you are also going thru this.  It is so hard.  My husband has Appendix cancer that has metastasized.  He is not very nice to me, which breaks my heart.  He doesn’t know how bad it is, and doesn’t want to know.  He thinks he’s going to beat it.  Well I am thinking of you and your husband.  If you need to chat I’m here.  Thinking of you both.  

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Traci-Renee
Frequent Contributor

Re: Overwhelmed - pancreatic cancer stage 4

Hi Patches,

I am just writing to you  and just wanted to see how you are doing.  🌹 My heart goes out to you my friend.  I hope you have the support you so need and deserve .  Please know I am constantly thinking of you.  
sincerely Your 4 Eva Friend,

Traci-Renee

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Patches
Frequent Contributor

Re: Overwhelmed - pancreatic cancer stage 4

I have some cousins my town who I am close to. My late husbands eldest son and I clicked on the first day we met which was approx 7 years ago. His same son and I have always been good friends but this relationship has changed for the positive. Day before my husband passed away his son and I were talking on the phone with speaker on. During the conversation I told him that he is not just his boy, that he is my son also. When my husband heard what his son said in reply he uncurled one finger and briefly raised his hand showing us he was happy ..... the reply ‘I love you mum’. In that brief moment I became an instant mum of a 41 yo amazing young man. My son and his partner live approx 2.5 to 3 hr drive away but will do everything and anything for me.
Traci-Renee
Frequent Contributor

Re: Overwhelmed - pancreatic cancer stage 4

Patches, 

 

I am so happy that such a beautiful thing came out of such grief.  Your son and his partner sound like such great people.  Your husband must have been so touched.  You three of you all share the love of your husband.  All deep within your hearts for he will always be my friend...please keep in touch.  Xoxo

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Patches
Frequent Contributor

Re: Overwhelmed - pancreatic cancer stage 4

Is interesting you used the words in out hears ..... song I had at his funeral as my tribute to my husband was ‘Two of us’ by band Birds of Toyko’ which talks about carrying him in my heart
Angel1
Occasional Contributor

Re: Overwhelmed - pancreatic cancer stage 4

Hi Traci-Renee,
Sorry to hear your husband has got Appendix cancer. It must be very hard when your husband is is not being very nice to you. It must be very hard for your husband also knowing that he has Appendix Cancer. He maybe isn't himself being sick as he is. I don't know your circumstances, but i am sure it is hard for you both though. My heart goes out to both of you.
Traci-Renee
Frequent Contributor

Re: Overwhelmed - pancreatic cancer stage 4

Thank you Angel1. ❤️

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Traci-Renee
Frequent Contributor

Re: Overwhelmed - pancreatic cancer stage 4

Hi Patches, 

Just wanted to check in with you and see how you are doing?  Xo

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Patches
Frequent Contributor

Re: Overwhelmed - pancreatic cancer stage 4

Hi Traci-Renee, sorry for not replying sooner.  just when I thought life was on the road to healing and finding how to live again my world got turned upside down.  

due to unexpected unpleasantness from my late husbands only sibling I moved out of my father-in-laws home, where we had been staying since Jan 2020, and returned to my home.  my late husbands birthday and mine are two days apart, 24 and 26 May.  I was on leave from work over those days and spent both days on my own packing and moving my items back home.  since my late husbands funeral I have seen my eldest step son 3 times, the last time was for less than 45mins.  he literally came to my home to collect items that his dad had said he wanted him to have.

I adopted 2 rescued kittens in July and they are the main thing that keeps me going each day.  First few months back at home life was surreal.  about 4 to 6 weeks prior to Christmas I feel like I have started grieving.  feel so alone ...... feel like I have lost my self confidence.  some days I have no energy or interest to do anything.  to try to give myself some thing to do, I have recently potted up some small raised garden beds but have no interest to pot up the rest of the ones I have bought.  some days even the smallest thing has been feeling scared and all the 'what if' scenarios run through my mind.

I have spoken to a counsellor who has explained these are all normal feeling and reactions but knowing that doesn't stop my tears 

 

 

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