I'm two weeks yesterday from my husband's death. The grief is so hard to predict or understand. I'm ok but I'm not really. I'm strong and yet I find some days almost impossible to get through. I don't know if its depression or extreme sadness. But as its been described somewhere else, it's like an illness. I try so hard to control it, but I'm fooling myself, it has me under its control. Time, people say. Patience. I can't imagine what this time next year will be like but I'm looking forward to it getting here. Thinking of you all, Jo x ... View more

What an awfully sad story, so young and so much to live for! What you are about to go through will not compare to anything you have ever experienced but you will cope and you will be strong for your 'sister' and provide her with your love and admiration. She will teach you things too in these next months that will be invaluable to you. My husband passed away 2 weeks ago, he had brain cancer, it's an awful one to have, it takes so much function away. To watch a man, so bright and so capable to be reduced to baby like beginnings was the hardest thing I could ever imagine experiencing. But, he showed me how to die. He taught me how to find peace and how to face that moment with strength and courage. We all die. Not all us know how to when that time comes and these experiences are oh so special. I'm still in the depths of my grief but even still I know how lucky I was to be with him all the way to the end. The lessons he taught me along the way and how now I will live better for having had him in my life. Stay strong, keep loving her and hold hr when she needs to be held. Cherish every bloody sec with her. Good luck, you're both in my thoughts. Jo x ... View more

He was a very loving and generous husband. Now that he is gone, all the hard work is over and I have time to reflect, it seems like an awful nightmare. Jo ... View more

Oh Min, The grieving just keeps going, it's supposed to get better, it isn't. I'm back to work next Monday, 3 weeks on and I'm dreading it. Maybe a snap back to reality of everyday life will help, who knows? Thanks, I appreciate your kinds words. Jo xx ... View more

I feel your I pain. You are losing so much, how can you not feel self pity? My husband suffered with this right till the end. I hated knowing how scared and angry he was when there was nothing I could do to take the fear away. He would shower when the fear became so palpable that he couldn't function somehow the water helped. He would also put his radio on with head phones to distract himself. In the final months I took him for acupuncture. He was a sceptic but when he realised it actually worked he looked forward to those sessions. He had an antidepressant drug as well, this helped a little with his mood. One day, just weeks before he died, he threw this wobbly. He was stamping his feet and yelling, "it's so unfair, I have lost so much" I yelled back, "I know. What you have to deal with is awful and you are not alone. Look at what I am losing. The greatest love of my life. I am 45, I am too young to be a widow. I have so much life ahead of me and now I have to face it alone. And, that is after I will watch you take your final breath." You are in my thoughts. Be strong. ... View more

Thank you.... Last night I smuggled two pizzas and a bottle of red in. We had a lovely time. He didn't speak but he ate pizza and drank his wine through a straw. Today, I found a spa in the hospital, I had it cleaned up and I gave my husband an hour long spa bath, he loved it. And, I enjoyed bathing him in the lamp lit room. Afterwards, we had a becks beer and he drifted off to sleep. Not all moments are shit,. Jo ... View more

What an awful thing for you to bare, you are too young. I am thinking of you and wishing you happy times to build memories for your children to share with their children. They will never forget you and the world is a better place for having you here. Best wishes.... ... View more