Hi debbiev, At the very least, I would get a second opinion from a different GP, just to put my mind at rest. There's no harm in checking again. All the best Budgie ... View more

Hi there Yas, It is hard when your "friends" want nothing more to do with you simply because they are too shallow to be able to cope with your problems, but in the end you can't force someone to like you. So walk away with your head held high & soon enough you'll have new friends who understand exactly what you're going through. Regarding how to enjoy the sun in future; Don't go outside without 50+ sunscreen & a hat on, & preferably keep your body covered in light clothing. You can still enjoy the sun, but you will now be very conscious of its dangers. All the best Budgie ... View more

The waiting is the worst. ... View more

Hi Lauren, You're probably doing all you can already. Just being there for her, with her, is an enormous positive in her life. You don't always have to be strong - it's good therapy to have a cry. There's nothing wrong with having a good cry together either. Sometimes it's the best thing to just let it all out. Unfortunately for you, being a nurse, you'll know all the things that your mum has to go thru before she finally has peace. Talk with her about everything. Ask questions about her past, what it was like in her childhood, etc. Although this will be hard, you should, if you haven't already, talk about her funeral plans. What does she want to happen. It will ensure she gets what she wants, and it will ease the burden on you when she does actually die. I wish you & your mum all the best Budgie ... View more

Hi Goran, Have you had any counselling? If not, it might be worth your while to find someone to talk things thru with. Of course, it doesn't help being Christmas time when you see & hear everything to do with "things for your loved ones" around everywhere you look. I hope you can find some peace. Budgie ... View more

Hi TravisD1992   I would have thought the biopsy would come from the direct site, not next to it, but I'm no doctor.  As sch said the oncologist won't get involved until there's a confirmed diagnosis, so keep testing until there's  a definite answer.  You may need to get a second opinion if the current GP is unwilling to keep going.   I wish your mother all the best.   Budgie  ... View more

As long as the fluid is coming out & not staying inside is a good thing. The fact that there is so much fluid may be a bit of concern - as Jane1 said, they may have removed the drain too early. Budgie ... View more

I've got no experience with this, but it wouldn't surprise me if it is a side effect of the chemo. You may need a referral to an ear, nose & throat specialist. I hope it clears up for you. Budgie ... View more

In April 2012 I had a lump just at the edge of my left jaw. I thought it was to do with my teeth as I had a broken tooth near the lump. I went to the dentist, had the tooth fixed, but the lump, I was told, had nothing to do with my teeth & the dentist rang a maxillofacial surgeon & got me an appt with him that afternoon. Immediate alarm bells going off in my mind, but, I went to the appt & was told he had no idea what it was as it had a pulse to it. I was to go in for an angiogram to see exactly what was there & to clamp any blood vessels etc. Well I had the angio & nothing was done because it was a large mass of tangled veins they could do nothing with. It was decided I'd have an op to remove it. After the surgery to remove a lump 9cmx7cmx2cm from my neck, Hubby & I had a holiday. The day after we returned I had the follow up appt & I was told then that I had metastatic renal cell carcinoma. The doc was all gloom & doom & very apologetic. My husband wasn't with me at that appt because we'd previously been told the lump wasn't cancer, so thought we had nothing to worry about. Anyway, I went & sat in the car, wondering if I should call hubby then & tell him, or wait till I got home to tell him in person. I decided to wait, so I went back to work. He happened to call me to see how it all went. I ended up telling him then because I'm hopeless at keeping things from him. He was quite harsh on himself for not being there. I also told my boss then, which was hard because we'd just had a co-worker have surgery for colon cancer. My husband & I are quite realistic & try to make the best of all situations. We talked about everything at each step along the way & have fully prepared my funeral & coffin (which is stationed in our lounge room ready & waiting). I fully expected to die long before this, but my body keeps surprising me. As our 4 kids are all grown & flown the coop, I didn't have to tell them straight away & I wanted more info on everything before I did. I went in for a CT & found the cancer had taken my right kidney, deposited itself right up against my spine at the L5 vertebrae & at the top of my left butt cheek, as well as the lump in my neck. I was 48 at the time of diagnosis- young for kidney cancer apparently, & it very rarely presents itself in the neck. Usually MRCC starts in the kidney & works it's way up in the major organs. So far, I've gone against all the rules for it, but rules are made to be broken. The 5 year survival rate for MRCC is only 8%, so I've done really well so far. I think I have my body's ability of going against the rules to thank for that, as at one time during my treatment, I had over 30 tumours in my body, but none in any other major organ except my left kidney. Our children were told over the phone as hubby & I were living in Darwin at the time, & it was hubby who had to tell them, else I would have just burst into tears & not been of much use. My siblings, I emailed as I have quite a few of them. They were all very upset as we'd lost our mother only 3 yrs previous to cancer. As well as loosing our eldest sister, grandmother & aunt to cancer, one of my other sisters & a brother also have cancer. So it's quite prevalent in the family. I used to email my siblings fairly regularly with updates, but I like to talk about it, & I think I'm too 'happy' to discuss things for their sensibilities, as I quite quickly stopped getting responses from some of them. So now I wait till they ask how things are going. It's not that they don't care - they just can't handle talking about the reality of my death. I also don't keep many friends as we move around the country alot, but I have one very dear friend who I've known since we were in our late teens/early twenties. I emailed her as well, & she came up to Darwin to spend some time with me, even though she had her own serious health problems at the time. As for the rest of the world - they don't need to know, unless they can learn something from my journey, then, I'm glad to talk. ... View more