Blogs - Page 131

Fifteen months on from that surrealistic moment of being told 'We're telling you - it's Cancer', I can hardly believe the twists and turns my life,my body, my emotions and my personality have experienced. From that stunning realisation that I wouldn't be going back to work for a while - I am a hairdresser and had a full mastectomy - losing my identity, vital human connections, and dealing with telling my family and my children, I could never have guessed at how big that black hole could be, how lonely or even that I would ever feel I was coming out the other side.

Recently found out my best friend, partner and dad to our kids has terminal liver cancer. The specialists knew he had cancer but not as bad as it is there is no point on a transplant because it apparently can grow back and then go into his other organs, The only treatment left now is tablets or chemotherapy injected directly into the tumors. He has been given no more than 2 years to live. I have told all his family and friends and any other phone calls needed because it is to hard for him to handle which he is appreciating.

Its been a long time since I visited Cancer Connections. My 'journey' as a carer ended over 2 years ago when my husband passed away. I continue on my journey as a widow and lone mum. The road has been long and lonely, extremely challenging and I don't wish it on anyone. Yet...........last week another child lost a parent, cancer claimed another victim. My sister in law's sister passed away after a 6 year battle with cancer. I didn't know her closely, we had met several times at several family occasions and we always spoke. I went to her wedding.

so i know ive posted so many blogs about people not caring anymore.. but i feel really down about it. I cant believe the amount of peopel that no longer care about me or my partner.. people that just dont bother asking how i am and people that no longer call him. Its our wedding in 6 weeks and some people havent even botherd to RSVP! im so tired of this cancer roller coaster.. i know theres still a lot of heartbreak ahead i just want to get off it! its so draining, some days i just want to stay in bed all day reading..

It 'seems' we reach the end of the road. I use the word 'seem' because we still hope that there are other options that we could do. We know the chance of finding something that can prolong my partner's life is slim. He still has hope. How could I just agree to the fact that was presented to us that there is nothing else anyone can do to help him? I've done so many research. I have no idea what else is possible within our financial limitation.

So its been a while since I have posted one of my blog posts. I have been rather busy with work and organising my upcoming holidays. This next post was written when I was groomsman at my friend's wedding. It was right in the middle of my treatment which made it very difficult. But it was very rewarding for me to see my friend tie the knot, even though I was not 100%. I made it, and that is what gave me encouragement for going back to do more chemo. http://www.thecancerstory.com/2011/11/part-21-my-day-at-beach.html