Blogs - Page 251

So- yesterday my darling husband started his radiotherapy....twelve treatments on his back in the hope it will shrink/burn/get rid of a tumour on his spine and stop causing his pain. We were warned of side effects, but this morning was hilarious (now, not so much as we were living through it). So we were on our way in the car to the hospital, just had to drop the five year old in at Nana's on the way. We are almost at Nana's when Bob decides he needs to vomit, then and there. Opens the car door, hurls and then I stop the car.

I'm reading a book called Illness by a philosopher named Havi carel. She sufferes from a rare lung disease and during her treatment she started to reflect on what being ill meant. To her, to her medical team, her family, friends and work colleagues.

It has now been 12 weeks since my husband died from this insidious disease. Other people are getting on with their lives, the dinners don't appear at the door anymore, the phone doesn't ring. There are no more cards or flowers being delivered. Once the kids are settled in bed, (they now need me to sit with them until they fall asleep), I sit alone on the couch. The tv is on but it doesn't take away the loneliness. I am tired but I hate going to bed, it is so EMPTY.

Everyone is touched by cancer at some stage, whether it's a personal experience or a friend or loved one... I just think I hadn't quite realised the full extent. I have friends who've had breast cancer, bowel cancer and I had kidney cancer but one of my dearest friends has found his true love Ron after years of searching, only for him to be being taken away. Ron already had prostate cancer when they met, which was been managed pretty well. Now 18mths on things aren't looking good, not only because it's spreading, but because he also has pancreatic cancer with secondaries.

It changes all the time, even after years. Some days it's a crystal clear view I have of my life. Other days it's as foggy as the road to hell. I'm getting used to the variation and seem to have found a way of living with however it is when i wake up. Mostly, that is. I have lots of support which I am pleased abouot. But the real struggle is inside.

Hi. I have been on this site many times and you have all have helped me. Finally my dad is coming to live with me but I am really afraid. He now has prostrate cancer as well as oesophageus cancer and ic incontient and I have to get help etc but with shower etc I am told I can only get help for 6 weeks!!!! What happens after that. My brother says he needs to go into a nursing home but I can't do that!!! I am feeling so overwhelmed now and don't know what to do.