Blogs - Page 144

hi guys,

So i am set to take 6 weeks of respite leave in just two days.... while i have been planning this for the last 3 weeks it still doesnt feel real and i dont know if im 100% ready to go away. im feeling all sorts of things.... anxiety, guilt, worry, stress, selfish and im happy and excited at the same time!

Tuesday was not a good day. I met with the surgeon who will operate on the liver met . It took a while for me to realise that he was talking about a 40 % survival rate in five years for this secondary cancer.i just cannot believe this is happening to me. I kept this news to myself but told my husband the next day which gave me some ease.how does one cope with the enormity of this..?

My partner had an appointment with his NO on Monday and went on his own - Mr Independent. It sounds like everything is OK. NO drops his Dex to 4mg a day but my partner seems to be scared of getting the dose down. Last time he tried, he lost his speech but I think it's more about the old treatment failed to control tumour growth which then caused brain swelling and lost of speech. I guess you can argue that taking higher dose Dex will keep everything under control. Well, it's not exactly true, my partner's weight has gone through the roof!

Hello to all my friends out there. I have some fantastic news to give to everyone that feels they need a spirit lift and it's nothing to do with cancer My partner has asked me to marry him and naturally I said yes. So on the 8th September I go through a name change and I couldn't be happier. Planning a wedding is a wonderful way to take your mind off cancer. I would recommend it to anyone. Maz

Well it seems a while since I mentioned that my last lot of chemo (Abraxane) wasn't working so here I am back on the original chemo " good old folfirinox" this is the chemo that made me so sick I dropped 8kgs in a few weeks & had so many side effects I wondered if it was worth while going on. Blow me down, I've had a little bit of nausea, my appetite has dropped & I have a few mouth ulcers but thats about it. Maybe it was all the prep work I gave myself & making sure I had all the right medications ready at hand but so far I'm cruising through it all. Lets just hope it's working.